"First off, I asked him to do seo. So, what does he do, tries to redesign my front index page with all kinds of crazy stuff. I told him i wanted the index page with the same design. "
He should have created feeder pages or if the home page was in dire need of optimization he should have used CSS to get rid of unnecessary HTML elements and move the spider friendly content to the top with out changing the site's appearance.
Example:
Cut & Paste this link to see what Search Engines see: www dot delorie dot com/web/lynxview.cgi?url=http%3A%2F%2Fbonkerz4booty.com%2F tgp%2Farchive%2FWhite-Booty.php
What Surfers See:
White Booty Videos
"In fact, I asked to talk to this joker by im or phone, he refuses stating he prefers email. This should have been a dead give away! "
Yeah that's your fault. Hind site is 20/20.
"Aside from the fact that the info he was spouting was actually conflicting with what google said you should do to seo. He made no sense and constantly contradicted himself."
Give some examples of his "suggestions."
"I can post the email that states, he hadn't even started working on seo or seo key word research yet, and had only worked on this retarded design that I didn't ask for. "
Post away!