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I won't get into all the revenge crap. I will say thay be very careful about giving her another chance. Character is pretty much a constant. People can alter their behavior one way or another but their character at this point (mid 20s I am guessing) is pretty much set in stone.
At least she has exposed her self for what she is early enough on in your marriage. IMHO, take your 3 year old and make a fresh start.
As for your friend, there is no hole deep enough.
The upside is now you have a good story that should help you get chicks. Women will want to prove to you that they are not all like that.
-TNVEric.
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