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First, my condolences on your loss.
My Stepfather, whom (like you) I consider my Dad, is getting along in years too - and he is also in a nursing home. Personally, I think it is a good place for him considering his health. He is surrounded by excellent caregivers, and he has made many friends there.
As for your Grandma, it sounds like she lived a good long life (despite her ups and downs at the end), and most importantly, she went out on her own terms.
I'm not sure how I will feel when I get to be that age, but I would hope that my loved ones will honor whatever my requests may be, so that I may either fight to be alive via medicine, or die with dignity, as it sounds like your Grandma did.
Remember all of the good moments you had together, and focus your love upon your surviving loved ones, even as you mourn the loss of your Grandma.
Best wishes as you find your way through these difficult times...
ADG
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