Porno Dan, have you ever considered trying your hand at the Art of Genital Origami?
I mean, with your showmanship skills, you might be a natural in this artform which has been passed down (some say tossed down), from hand to gland for centuries.
Check out the web site
Puppetry of the Penis.
Here is a YouTube video about their "act":
Give it a whack - you might enjoy it!
ADG