WHAT PORN CAN'T TEACH US ...
1. Expected time
A recently released study of Canadian and U.S.-based sex therapists found that sex should last between three and 13 minutes.
Now before we start clocking in, the survey -- to be published next month in the Journal of Sexual Medicine -- is not tallying up time spent on foreplay. For the record, it takes women between 10 and 20 minutes to reach orgasm through sex.
2. Communication
So far removed from reality is the well-hung pizza delivery guy seducing the lonely housewife in less than 10 words, our expectations can get fuzzy.
In porn, people don't generally talk beyond "harder, faster ... Oh yeah, that's it!" before stripping down.
Here, a successful seduction calls for nothing more than two horny people. No one ever frets over who'll pick up the dinner tab or whether his paying implies sex later on.
In porn, even the simplest of gestures, a friendly elevator hello, say, leads to having sex right here, right now.
Unfortunately sexual gratification isn't quite so simple. Great sex requires intimacy (for us non-porn star earthlings at least).
Get talking and be willing to explore one another's desires.
Does she quiver when you touch her in a certain way? What techniques have you tried that drive him beyond-the-brink wild? Pay attention to these things.
3. Finding the spot
It's the question that never seems to find a hard truth: Does the G-spot exist? While it's a porn favourite, depending upon whom you ask, it's either a hidden gem worth searching for or a hunt more futile than trying to find Bigfoot.
While some claim this is a highly erogenous zone that brings a large percentage of women to the thrilling peaks of orgasm, fact or fiction remains unclear. Still, it doesn't hurt to try, now does it?
4. Body beliefs
Forget porn legend John Holmes, fellas.
Trust me, in the debate over whether size matters, one thing is clear -- women don't have mammoth-sized expectations.
In porn, men are super-sized down under and women aroused quicker than ordering up a burger at a fast food joint, but neither is reality.
If you're checking to see how you measure up, this isn't the place to do it. OK guys, here it goes: The average penis size erect is between five and six inches. In rest mode, it sits at about three and a half inches. Feel better now?
5. The male-female divide
Porn is created with guys in mind. That said, it could give both sexes terrific ideas for new positions, exploring bedroom games and heightening communication.
Still, education must expand beyond the fleshly delights of our naughty collections.
In his book, She Comes First, New York-based relationship therapist Ian Kerner writes that women reach orgasm about 25% of the time with intercourse, but succeed at a rate of 81% through oral pleasures. You do the math.
You can read the whole articule here.