View Single Post
Old 04-06-2009, 07:58 PM  
Danielle
Confirmed User
 
Danielle's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: My Coffin
Posts: 1,227
Airline operating systems

UNIX Airways
Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together
piece by piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are
supposed to be building.

Air DOS
Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and
let the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push
again, jump on again, and so on ...

Mac Airlines
All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look
and act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details,
you are gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want
to know, and everything will be done for you without your ever having
to know, so just shut up.

Windows Air
The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy
baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10
minutes in the air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

Windows Vista Air
Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and
takes out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it
explodes.

Linux Air
Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start
their own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave
the runways themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of
printing the ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket
yourself. When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts,
a wrench and a copy of the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully
adjustable seat is very comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on
time without a single problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful. You
try to tell customers of the other airlines about the great trip, but
all they can say is, "You had to do what with the seat?"

Hugs,
Danielle
Danielle is offline   Share thread on Digg Share thread on Twitter Share thread on Reddit Share thread on Facebook Reply With Quote