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Old 04-17-2009, 01:44 PM  
KA_Ben
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Kick Ass Pictures Offers Susan Boyle 1 Million Dollars To Star In Porn

Susan Boyle Offered $1M to Star in Porn Movie

Internet Singing Sensation to Lose Virginity on Film?


Glendale, CA ? Kick Ass Pictures, a Los Angeles-based adult entertainment company, is offering internet singing sensation Susan Boyle $1 million to lose her virginity on camera. Ms. Boyle became an instant superstar this week when footage of her incredible singing on ?Britain?s Got Talent? was viewed by tens of millions of people on the internet.

Kick Ass is so confident that she will accept the offer that they have already set up the web site SusanBoyleXXX.com where people can vote on the movie?s title (e.g. Desperately Shagging Susan, Never Been Banged), theme song (e.g. Madonna?s Like a Virgin, Foreigner?s Feels Like the First Time) and co-star, among other things.

The 47-year-old Ms. Boyle claims that she?s never been kissed. ?The logical extension of that statement is that she?s still a virgin,? said Kick Ass president Mark Kulkis. ?We have always wanted to produce a movie in which a bona fide virgin loses her maidenhood on camera. That?s a very personal, intimate moment in a woman?s life. Doing it in front of bright lights and cameras in a San Fernando Valley studio will make it that much more special.?

Assuming Ms. Boyle accepts the offer, the plan is to fly her out to Los Angeles ? on Virgin Airlines of course ? and introduce her to possible co-stars. ?We want real sexual chemistry,? Kulkis explained. ?Since we have no way of knowing what Susan?s ?type? is, we?ll introduce her to a variety of gentlemen of different races, ages and um, ?endowments.? Personally, I think she and Ron Jeremy would be a perfect match.?

The plan also calls for Ms. Boyle to record a theme song for the movie, which would subsequently be released as a single. ?There are several different songs we are considering,? Kulkis noted. ?We?re relying on input from the SusanBoyleXXX.com web site to help us make the final decision.?

The $1 million offer from Kick Ass is good for one week. ?We want to get this movie shot and out while Susan has the world?s attention,? said Kulkis. ?Besides, after 47 years of virginity, I?m sure Susan is also anxious to get something cracking as soon as possible!?
Kick Ass Pictures is the only adult entertainment company in the world to guarantee ?No Fake Boobs? in every movie. They can be found on the internet at KickAss.com.
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