Quote:
Originally Posted by Mutt
you're no longer involved in your paysite?
|
The only difference with my site now and my site before is that I'm not on it all day waiting for members that probably aren't there anyway. I'm not sitting in three EMPTY cam shows a week. I'm not embarrassed that my puppy mill content -shot by a guy who had never even picked up a camera before- is being seen by NO ONE. All the while, I'm going broke more by the day, having to do some pretty crazy shit just to get by while the site was "taking off." Problem is, is never did, and never will. Support is everything.
Fuck exclusivity
- give me a billboard any day.
I came out here because I am tired of watching it all go by while I sit waiting on things to happen. I'm not a benchwarmer, and fuck anybody that's got a problem with that. I wanted to work with REAL photographers, and deal with REAL companies, and make REAL moves, resulting in REAL money. I spent almost two years spinning my wheels while other people got the royal treatment, and I decided that I wasn't going to stand there while what should have been my career circled the drain. It's been far too dependent upon other people. I went bankrupt because of that fucking site. It's a source of constant pain and embarrassment for me personally, and it's a near death blow professionally. I'm sure the anyone with any real knowledge of it would agree that it was a good idea...and a bad application.
I've been here for a month, and I've worked with some fantastic photogs, as well as scheduling shoots with a few more...
I've made more money doing shoots since I've been here than my website made the entire time I was active. So it kinda speaks for itself.
So now, instead of holding my breath til work trickles down past the on again off again headliners and maybe falls in my lap, I'm doing it myself. I'm not mad at anybody, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna sit there and take it either. Frankly, my internet experience has been one pathetic series of disappointments after the next, so my medium has changed back to what I wanted to do at the start.
I'm guilty of drive and determination. I'm guilty of throwing up a middle finger to the pecking order. I'm guilty of having aspirations, perhaps above my station...perhaps not. I'm guilty of having an opinion, and expecting people to do what the fuck they say they will...not getting the blown off cuz I'm not the golden child. I'm guilty of raising the bullshit flag too often. But when you've been standing bullshit for so long...
Of course I still have respect for the one who tried to make it happen...
...ultimately, I think it was a matter of very unfortunate timing on both our parts. I came in at a time where the industry started paying for it's earlier transgressions. I came in at a time when a spoiled child was able-thru actions that had fuck-all to do with me- to choose my reality for me when she was choosing her own. Thanks for that.
But the good thing about it is that I never sold my soul to the devil. Money isn't everything, and truth is truth. The next chapter has already begun, and it is no longer dependent upon any one person or thing, except for me...which is where it should have been in the first place.
xxx