Hey everyone, it?s your old pal pushpills aka grogan. I'm posting this here first and will be reposting on the other board. You may remember me from my shiny forehead and love of the ladies. I come to you this evening a much different person than I was before. A bit older and fatter, wiser and very humbled. I?d like to give you an update on what?s going on and am looking for a bit of help getting to Hollywood. I know it?s pretty low to beg on the internet, but I?m looking for work and contacts not just handouts, and I?m sure some of you would be interested in knowing what I?m up to. I?ve given to more than a few in need online so maybe karma will come around my way. This post could get a little long, so I?ll provide cliff notes at the bottom if you?d like to skip on by.
The old me:
The current me:
Yes, my face is still shiny.
As many of you know, many moons ago I was an affiliate of a lot of adult programs and marketed fairly successfully online, as well as posting some memorable threads on the boards. My life has changed a lot from making money online, wasting it on booze and girls and yammering the night away in a hormone and alcohol fueled stupor.
Before I disappeared from the online scene my business started to spiral out of control along with my drinking, my best friend died suddenly and my girlfriend left me (boo hoo). I spent the next year in a drunken depressive haze. I pulled myself up and spent the next three in film school. I really learned a lot about life, who I am, and have really bettered myself. I?ve worked on directing, producing and have a side passion in production design. I?ve been able to purchase gear for myself and barely make ends meet as I do freelance work and art projects. I do not drink or smoke (for 2 years now), I?m also off caffeine and processed sugar and am exercising every day.
I?m currently renting out a condo here in Chicago from a family member, who is putting it on the market next month. Business isn?t so great right now, I?ve got about $100 to my name and a few gigs lined up for August, business gets even worse the colder it gets. I?ve decided I?m going to sell enough gear to make it out to L.A. and do my best to make it in the film world. I?m looking for any support anyone might be willing to give to me, be it a donation, a room to stay, work that I can do in L.A., help meeting people, anything. I have a 4 piece arri light kit, a canon xha1s, a 5d mark II and a mixer. I?ll be selling only what I must to get out west, but whatever I have left I can use on any projects anyone might have. I?m also well trained in all aspects of production, be it doing call sheets, budgeting, scheduling, gripping, art department work, PA, etc. I?d even be happy to clean your gutters.
If you find it worthwhile to help me pursue my dreams, you can send a paypal donaton in any amount to:
[email protected]
I just ordered a new epassporte card so if that?s the only way you can help my account is: hctmarketing
My icq is 328524801
You can email me at the email address above and I?ll send you my phone number too if you?d like to help out another way, especially with work in L.A. or you can icq me. I will make a point to send pictures and updates to those who are so generous to help me, in whatever way you can. Even if it?s just a thread bump I?m thankful.
I really appreciate any support I might get and I?m looking forward to saying hello to so many of you, it has been so long! I also realize some of you are going to call me an idiot an a loser and that?s fine, I?ll take my lumps.
Best wishes to you all, thanks for listening!
Your friend,
Steve aka pushpills aka grogan
Cliff notes:
I blew my money being a drunk stupid kid, had the worst year of my life and have worked hard to get sober and find what I am passionate about. I am moving to Hollywood to pursue my filmmaking ambitions. If you care to help out, see the above info. Thanks!