Two weeks ago tonight was the last time I spoke to my friend Tim.
He posted on his Facebook that Friday night:
Quote:
I've had a weird feeling in my chest all day, and felt dizzy and lightheaded all day too.
better stake claim to my stuff now bros, looks like im dying.
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He fucked around for a bit and joked about who would get what, and then went to bed. He never woke up. When his roommate checked on him Saturday morning he was already long gone.
He was 30, in decent shape and lived a completely straight edge lifestyle. No known illnesses. No idea what happened and may not know for "up to 8 months" according to the county.
It fucking blows. I've lost friends and immediate fam before, and I was hoping those experiences would make dealing with this easier, but it seems to only compound the situation. We talked pretty much daily, he was funny as fuck, and now there's this huge hole in my life. I keep waiting to get an update about some crazy chick looking like a bag of smashed assholes coming on to him at a gas station in pinellas park, and when I come across some crazy rediculous juggalo bullshit in my travels I have no one to text about it. No one to share the love of rap snacks with and no one to giggle with in the back of a show, going to see some shitty band that no one really wanted to see anyway but was just a great excuse to hang out.
I'm doing alot better, not looking for sympathy, just felt like venting a bit and 'splaining why I haven't been around GFY as much recently. I'm not sad for myself, sad that the world lost an awesome person, a person better than myself. Its one of those things that reminds to to tell the people you love how much you love them and cherish the people in your life that matter. I'm pretty straight up with the people close to me, so I have no regrets where our friendship was concerned, but if there was a god I wish he would give me a do-over so I could figure out some way to fix this shit.
Never be afraid to tell someone you love them, never got to bed angry, and be forgiving to those you care about. Shit happens, tomorrow holds no guarantees.
Much Love.