Hi Yvette.
FIrst of all, blogspot is not good for adult blogs. Soon or later your blogs will be deleted.
Try this one
thumblogger.com
as most of adult bloggers have blogs there
Answer for your first question
adultblogresource.com/submitter/ (the best one)
You can also submit here if you want
addyourblogs.com
adultwebmastergroup.com/submitter
and if you really want here
pornblogsubmitter.com
1blogsubmitter.com
blogsubmiter.com
but be aware that you must put recip link on your blog and if you sumbit your blog on all of these directories I gave links to you, you will have 100 outgoing links from your blog which is not so smart for SEO
2. If your blogs have similar niche you can cross link them, it's good for SEO. It's also good to have for example 10 .thumblogger blogs and one .com domain and link from .thumblogger to .com so you can build up your .com domain and be good on google. Also, you must put recip link from com to thumblogger for a few blogs. Try to read somewhere tutorial about SEO and A>B>C linking.
3. "Any link on your blog must work for you, not against you", so, be careful what will you put on your blog, try to notify and delete dead links as soon as possible. Try to get maximum of your blog. If your sponsor doesn't have good commercials for example your grannies blog, check other sponsors and put their links. Don't be afraid to mix sponsors' content on one blog.
Use this
thunder-ball.net
for hard links exchange
I will add more if I remember something ;)
All the best ;)