Quote:
Originally Posted by Sly
What can be done to overcome this? Self awareness?
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I personally think reinforcement works best.
You ONLY do someone a favor OR be nice to someone when they have earned it. For example, if you buy this new friend lunch/dinner out of nowhere, he might or might not ask you to buy him another meal. But if you keep doing it over time, it's very likely that he would expect you to buy him
ALL his meals. (Im sure everyone knows someone or 10 like that, lol) However, if he helped you move the day before, and you want to reward him by buying him a meal, then he is not as prone to think you're his free cash whenever he is hungry. But of course, there are always nice friends/girlfriends/people who dont take advantage of others and would reciprocate when they can.
Imma use my pup as an example again. Trainers train dogs using reinforcement all the time (I'm in no way implying that men are equal to dogs so dont quote me. lol
) Whenever I see him do something good, I'd give him a treat (right away). But if I give him treats all day long with or without the behavior, he would probably just "expect" the "free treat" without trying to work for it. [Same goes for your kids, friends/girlfriends, coworkers/employees/employers.]
Doesnt same goes for men? If a woman gives it up too quickly, you guys wouldnt work as hard. lol!
p.s. I'm not saying we should all be calculating and only be nice to someone because he/she would do something beneficial to ourselves. But people (even animals) can sense that if you always go out of your way to help them. And we always know who to mess with and who not, because again, we are highly adaptive and intelligent.
