I use
http://wordpress.org/extend/plugins/...ss-flowplayer/
FV WordPress FlowPlayer, so far its the best one I've come across.
You should never have to chmod anything, wordpress has an option to upload the ZIPed plugin and it will install it automatically for you.
In the dashboard click
Plugins> Add New< Upload < Choose File and you should be able to take it from there..
ALSO. If you click
Plugins > Add New> and then just search for it,, you can install it right from that page.. its literally the easiest thing in the world
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