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always ask them because then it's documented.
just because 1 company gets away with things doesn't mean you will.
the more business you do with paypal the more leverage you get. for example they'd ban a small site in an instant if there is a complaint but will never ban a bigger company. A good example of this is DealExtreme.com who used to sell a lot of illegal and counterfeit things but their volume was too large for paypal to consider banning them. They just tell them to stop doing it.
So make sure u always have things documented, especially an area like adult and paypal
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