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Back in high school a friend of mine started fucking a girl I just broke up with. He didn't ask or anything which kind of breaks an unwritten rule so I decided he needed to pay. He was still a friend so an asskicking was out of the question.
I decided to call every 800 number I could find and request a free catalog/information/video for my horny friend. I had him getting everything from Soloflex videos, Troybilt lawnmower videos, Craftmatic adjustable bed videos, womens catalogs, sex toy catalogs, tampon samples, condom samples, Astroglide, even a visit from the Church of Latter Day Saints (mormons).
Literally hundreds of items showed up over my 2 week assault. He started saving all of the shit he received. By the time it was over, there were two large grocery bags filled with junk mail. I hope fucking my ex was worth it.
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I like pie.
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