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When I traveled back from USA to Spain some years ago my suitcase got "lost". I went to the airport authorities and told them completely serious that my suitcase with a semisphere of plutonium didn't arrive.
The girl that was taking notes became blank like a sheet of paper. Then she asked me if it was true and if it really was true she would have to call the airport security officers.
I replied that I had very bad memory, but I think that there was a semisphere of plutonium packed in my bag just in the same place where I have put my dirty socks. By that time the airport police was already there.
5 minutes later and a phone call from police to police, turned out that my bag was in Paris. Still don't know how that happened since my plane didn't land in Paris.
The next day a policeman brought my bag to home and the guy was really cackling. He just asked "Are you the guy that said he had lost an atom bomb?" and I corrected him "Only a plutonium semisphere". Then he replied "Well, the airport police guys have been filling papers all the night because of you. I don't like them anyways, well done!". They didn't even open the bag. I guess that they didn't like my dirty socks on the xrays.
I doubt you could do that in USA without running into some serious trouble... But something along the lines of "Excuse me officer, I think that someone has stolen my plutonium bag" will always grant that your bag will be located really fast and that your missing bag will be a top priority matter.
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