Quote:
Originally Posted by nico-t
to me it sounds you still feel guilty of photographing nude chicks. Your way of coping with it is not by being in peace with yourself and the past and leave it behind you, instead you burden everyone around you with your guilt and even made a career our of it. It has become a part of your everyday life which is the opposite of what you should do or you'll never find peace. Serious tip, I doubt you are open to this though since you are knee deep in this guilt driven lifestyle.
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You're absolutely, 100% correct, Nico-t. I completely admit and own the truth of this statement. I believe that the things I've done really should be repaid. One way I do that is to speak openly about it. When a woman comes up after a speech with tears in her eyes and says, "Thank you for apologizing. This is what ruined my marriage." that feels like a bit of redemption. When some young guy says what he's heard helps him to stop looking at porn, that feels like a bit of redemption. When a sex addict in a recovery group meeting comes up and says, "I've been going to meetings for 18 months, but what you said in 5 minutes has helped me more than anything I've ever heard" that feels like a bit of redemption. When a man emails out of nowhere and says, "I heard you two years ago at ____ church. I've never looked at porn since that day. Thank you." that feels like a bit of redemption...