Originally Posted by kane

I used to date a girl whose roommate was a nurse. One Christmas she had a couple come into the ER late one night. They explained that things got really hot while they were having sex and she took some of the lights off the Christmas tree and shoved them up his butt. Now they were stuck.

They didn't have him sit down for fear that the pressure might break the bulbs. They could't remove them because they had created a reverse suction so they filled the guy up with muscle relaxers and let him shit them out.

So clearly, lights from the tress should not be on the list of things that are safe.