Originally Posted by Jel

Had this a couple of times in the last 18 months... best thing I did was remind myself that the loss was on those left behind, and the mates who had died would be fine wherever they were, or weren't. That helped me not 'feel sorry for myself' (not quite the correct term I know, but closest I could verbalise it) and thus while I was obviously going to miss them, and it was a downer rather than an upper - I was able to deal with both deaths pretty well, with a very quick grieving stage.

Everyone is different of course, so hope you aren't in emotional pain for too long, or if you are then at least don't suffer too much from it

Oh and just to add the obvious, that isn't always so obvious when you are in it: never beat yourself up for any pain you are ever in, it's perfectly natural and needs to be experienced as part of the process of whatever the process is.