It was a hot humid day when I decided to install wordpress. The AC had also stopped working so I was sweating like a pig... To be honest, had I not been enticed by the 'One-Click-Install' I would have given it a miss today and waited for cooler weather.
I clicked the one click button, filled in the details, gave it my email and clicked install. I then logged into the admin, changed my password and checked the blog... "Hello World' it said... That was enough for today I thought as I removed my clammy sweaty clothing, stripped naked and made my way to the shower...
Soon the cool water was cascading over my head and running down my sweaty back. I almost felt human again and delighted to be free from the overpowering humidity, for a least a while, so I relaxed and in doing so, let my guard down...
Big mistake - It was at exactly that moment that Wordpress attacked. I found myself pushed from behind, and ended up face first with my cheek against the cool tile of the bathroom wall. I tried to move but couldn't! Then I felt my other cheeks being roughly stretched apart... My worst fears were realised as I realised what was happening, but it was too late to stop it now. I was alone, naked and totally helpless as Wordpress began to have its wicked way with me!
I cried out at the excruciating pain as the all the templates entered me. I tried one final struggle to fight it off, but alas - No way. So, I'm ashamed to say, I did the only thing I could as I let Wordpress take me. I tried to relax but I couldn't, so I simply screwed up my eyes and bit my lip as a waited for it to be over. It kept pounding me from behind, over and over, with no signs of relenting... It was too much for ANY man to take, so I eventually lost consciousness and slumped down into the shower...
No idea how long I had been out for but I awoke to an incredibly sore pain in my back passage, rectal tearing and blood all over my legs and the shower enclosure. Not only had I been violated in the most unpleasant way, I felt that I could no longer trust Wordpress again. My life, from that point had been irrevocably changed forever.
So... Let my misfortune be a warning to you all - Please be careful with Wordpress guys - Don't let it happen to you.
