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The sooner to simply give into the despair the faster you can be free from it. Just remember that nothing is getting better nor will it. Admit that to yourself...really be honest of how utterly shitty things are (and have) become and you take away the power for this is hurt you. Become one with the pain - Be The Pain.
Being an "adult" is a relative concept and as such, totally without any real meaning except as something people say who really are just as fucked up and usually more hopeless themselves than even you clearly are. If they can see through the veil of denial that they have built their shallow and empty shell of a life on to be real about.
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