Here you go Mark - In the news today Trump..
In the news today Trump farted.
An unnamed source speaking on condition of anonymity informs us that the president's flatulence was caused by a rare brand of Russian Caviar. Our sources confirm that this brand of Russian Caviar is served both in the Russian Embassy and the Kremlin. A soon to be published leaked memo is said to allude to the Trump - Putin connection and contain details of the President's 1995 tax returns.
Attempts to contact both the White House and the Kremlin for comment have remained unanswered.
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officially retired as of March 01 2018 but still fucking around and getting into shit.
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