Traditionally, the 26th of December, the day after Xmas day, is known as 'Boxing Day' A common misconception is that this is in some way related to the the sport of boxing, but it is not.ha
This traditional holiday, is a day upon which we believe will bring us great luck and good fortune in the coming year, provided we follow the tradition carefully. Basically, you are required to take a poo in a small box, (The first poo after your Xmas meal is ideal) and then to keep that box with you at all times until the new year. Upon the clock striking the new year in, you are then free to flush it away... But I dont...
The exact amount of luck and good fortune that you will receive by following this tradition, is directly correlated by how you treat the box. You really need to treat it like part of the family for it work correctly... If you just keep it on a shelf, or in the corner of the room,. it will bring you some luck, but in order to get the full benefit, you need to keep the box with you at all times. Take it and place it on the table while you eat a meal, and tucking it in next to you, all snug and warm when you go to bed, is the best way to maximise the benefits.
Naturally, I go one step further, and don't bother with the box at all, coz i cunt a4d1...
Perhaps that's why I have had such shitty luck in 2019? But anyway, my Boxing Day Poo is on the desk with me as I type this. Currently, its 'brother' is in my pants
Good Times !!!