Quote:
Originally posted by ytcracker
LM - thanks a lot for the advice - ill give it a shot.
i do see a lot of craving attention from her and i try to give it to her whenever possible, sometimes i think she thinks its not enough. fact is, i dont have ALL that time to devote to her and my daughter and i wish i did.
PK good philosophy for sure as well.
i dont want to abandon all hope just yet i dig challenges and weathering storms and what not, it simply is true however that if it hurts too much to love it aint worth it.
good words from all thanks.
a more candid shot not at her best - you probably met her at internext if u saw me
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YT, went through the same sort of thing with my wife after we had our son. Take LadyM's advice and see what goes. Sometimes just laying it on the table and saying exactly what is on your mind is the best thing you can do. More than likely she'll do the same and you can take it whichever direction you choose from there. Your disagreements sound EXACTLY like the ones we were having. My wife is a homemaker also. One of the main things bothering her was that she can't just up and go to work if she wanted to because we have a son now. Everyone wants to be independant but neither of us wanted our son in day care. That left it at if she went to work I would be watching our son while she was gone so of course I would cut back on my work. Being that I make way more than any job is going to pay it would put a serious hit in our lifestyle.
I would bet one of the reasons she thinks you don't spend enough time with her is she is bored to death. Imagine not having a job to go to or anything to get you away from the daily grind. Just sitting still all day every day makes the day drag on so it seems like forever that she isn't spending time with you. As much as people complain about work I couldn't imagine not having something to do everyday to challenge myself.
Good luck with whatever you decide. I know exactly the position you are in because you explained our life to a T. We had too many fights to count but we stuck it out and made it work. As for her not wanting you at a bar, I really doubt she just doesn't want you at a bar having fun. There is a reason she is against it whether it be jealousy, insecurity, or just lashing out over something else that is bothering you.
By the way, I got married when I was 20. My wife was a month shy of 18 at the time. That was in October of 1999. If you can somehow work it out it is definately worth it.