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VERY tasteless but funny joke... Be warned, may offend some.
Mrs. Jones gets a call from the hospital. They tell her that her
husband's been in a terrible car accident. She rushes to the hospital,
runs in to the ER and says her husband's been in an accident. They tell
her Dr. Smith is handling the case. They page the doctor. He comes out
to the waiting room to see a terribly upset Mrs. Jones.
"Mrs. Jones?" the doctor asks.
"Yes sir, what's happened? How is my husband?"
The doctor sits next to her and says, "Not good news. Your husband's
accident resulted in two fractures of his spine."
"Oh my God" says Mrs. Jones, "what will be his prognosis?"
"Well, Mrs. Jones, his vital signs are stable. However, his spine is
inoperable. He'll have no motor skills or capability. This means you
will have to feed him." Mrs. Jones begins to sob. "And you'll have to
turn him in his bed every two hours to prevent pneumonia." Mrs. Jones
begins to wail and cry loudly. "Then, of course," the doctor continued,
"you'll have to diaper him as he'll have no control over his bladder and
of course these diapers must be changed at least five times a day."
Mrs. Jones begins to shake as she cries, sobs, wails. The doctor
continues: "And you'll have to clean up his feces on a regular basis as
he'll have no control over his sphincter. His bowel will engorge
whenever and quite often I'm afraid. Of course you must clean him
immediately to avoid accumulation of the putrid effluent he'll be
emitting regularly."
Now Mrs. Jones is convulsing sobbing uncontrollably and beginning to
wither off the bench into a sobbing pitiful mass.
Just then Dr. Smith reaches out his hand and pats Mrs. Jones on the
shoulder. "Hey, I'm just fucking with you, he's dead."
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