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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Icy Hellish Tundra
Posts: 2,534
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Quote:
Originally posted by juicyjew
I am, like, totally GAY for MPA2.
It?s true. When I say I?m gay for MPA2, I don?t mean it in the usual oh-dude-I?m-so-overly-excited-about-this-random-thing-that-I-must-gesticulate-flamboyantly sense of the word; no, I mean if MPA2 had a penis, I would forgo a lifetime of ardent heterosexuality and allow said penis to stir my backdoor brownie mix.
I recall my first meeting with MPA2, when Oystein introduced us in Vegas almost two years ago. We were both fairly new to the industry at the time ? a pair of fresh-faced, young innovators looking to shake up the Jizz Biz and leave our own distinctive, mushroom-shaped impressions on the collective cheek of the industry. MPA2 told me how it dreamt of being the world?s most popular sponsor automation package, with features like cascading processors, multiple programs, and even built-in anti-cheating systems ? at a price within anyone?s reach. I told it I had a dream once where my own boogers revolted against my face ? from the inside.
MPA2 listened patiently while I regaled it with tales of the brutal, snot-soaked coup d'etat, and even half-smirked when I used the phrase ?mutinous mucus?. At this point, I realized MPA2 and CJbucks were destined to walk the fields of adult website sponsor-dom together -- who am I to argue with kismet?
We began slowly. I moved MPA2 from LA and set it up in a swanky server at National Net. Not wanting to overburden the new software, I started with only a few sites and one revenue-sharing program on CJbucks, but MPA2?s capacity for heavy loads soon became apparent. It wasn?t satisfied with only a few hundred members ? it wanted MORE members, LONG-LASTING members; it wanted members buried DEEP within my vast network of sites. MPA2 put more strange, new members in my greasy hands than a Turkish bathhouse.
But my affair with MPA has also been a boon for the webmasters of CJbucks too. Because MPA2 takes the complexity out of managing a sponsor program, I have time to keep webmasters and publishers happy with new tools with which to generate revenue for themselves. It allows me to diddle my paysites constantly, so the webmasters can keep pumping out oodles of delicious sign-ups. I don?t use the term ?oodles? lightly. In fact, here in Atlanta, Georgia, I reckon a man would get the ever-loving shit kicked out of him for using that word, but I use it proudly -- that?s just how gay I am for MPA2.
Like any relationship though, ours was not without its problems. Functionalities needed customizing and specific components required integrating, but whenever the road got bumpy or MPA2 and I became frustrated with each other, Oystein set down his horned helmet and goblet of lamb?s blood to mend our troubled love. It?s strange, really, that a Norwegian Viking would find time between marauding and pillaging to provide topnotch customer service to his clients, but then, I would expect nothing less from Mansion Productions.
And, apparently, I?m not the only one who expects great things from them. I thought I was special, and, like a fool, I believed what MPA2 and CJbucks had together was unique. I was horribly wrong. It seems MPA2 has been providing the same quality automation services for dozens of other companies -- Tramp! Hussy!
I suppose we?ll have to keep working together on a professional level. I?ll swallow my pride, and take it like a man -- just not the same way as before.
Of course, I?ve heard MPA2?s cousin, MMS is, like, a total hottie. The following picture goes out to MMS ? I can?t wait to see how you manage my member area, big boy.
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OK.....it's either the sleep deprivation of Paul's getting funnier and funnier! Hands down THE winner in my opinion....
I always knew you were gay 
*hugs*
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