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No no, you don't understand. I nicknamed my cock "remote".
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Actually CD, it's ok! I remembered that you are still single and are granted a little manly man code leeway.
Sharing remote = ok (if no sports are on)
Cuddling after sex = ok (if you turn it into a nap opportunity)
Talking about your feelings = ok (basic, no in depth)
Helping with household chores = (ok, however, you should start laying the groundwork now by burning dinner, dying the clothes pink when doing laundry, etc.. while still getting credit for trying)
Once you get married, the zero tolerance goes into full effect