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Do you work for UPS because I swear I saw you checking out my package?
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"Let's slip out of these wet clothes and into a dry martini."
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"I believe I speak for most men when I say 'Hello'."
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Hey baby! There are about 1500 murders being committed right now....what do you say we go up to my place and make ourselves a little alibi?
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"My psychiatrist sent me for an MRI because she thinks I have a magnetic personality."
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I wish I was one of your tears. That way I could be born in your eyes. Land on your Cheek. And Die on your lips.
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man: are you jamaican?
woman: why?
man: cause jamaican me horny.
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This has always been my favourite line, cute, cheezy, non-gender based and non-offensive:
Do you sleep on your stomach?
Uh.. No. Why?
Well then, can I?
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here are 2 that always work for me and They are cool
1. walk up to a guy/girl and hand them a Dollar and say HERE give this to your mom for doing such a good job "" at Birth when she had you "
2. Are you in to Casual Sex or should I dress up??
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MAN: HEY ARE YOU FROM TENNESSE?
GIRL: NO, WHY?
MAN: CAUSE YOUR THE ONLY TEN I SEE!
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Hey~ The guys at my school really likes this one.
You know what winks and screw like a tiger? (then wink at em)
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ouch you must be sore!! why? because you just dropped out of heaven
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''come sit on my lap and lets talk about the first thing that pops up,'' It never works.
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If I follow you home, would you keep me?
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Quick, give me your phone number before I don't want it any more.
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You ask a girl "where are we?" She says where you are, then you say, I thought we were in heaven cause i could have sworn you were an angel
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That shirt looks very becoming on you! If I were fuzz on that shirt I would becoming on you too!
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