Cows by Culture....
CHRISTIAN DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your
neighbour.
A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one and
gives it to your neighbour.
A REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbour has none. So what?
A DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbour has none. You feel
guilty for being successful. So you vote people into office who tax your
cows,forcing you to sell one to raise money to pay the tax. Then the people
you voted for take your tax money, buy a cow and give it to your
neighbour.You feel righteous.
A COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and
provides you with milk.
A FASCIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and
sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of
sabotage.
DEMOCRACY, CANADIAN STYLE: You have two cows. The government
taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign
country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.
CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. You sell one, buy
a bull and build a herd of cows.
BUREAUCRACY, CANADIAN STYLE: You have two cows. The government takes them
both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, then pours the
milk down the drain.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one, and
force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the
cow drops dead.
A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want
three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one
eleventh the size of ordinary cows and produce twenty times the milk.
A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live
for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows but you don't know
where they are. You break for lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and
learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and
open another bottle of vodka.
A MEXICAN CORPORATION: You think you have two cows, but you're
not sure where they are. You'll look for them tomorrow.
A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belongs to you. You
charge others for storing them.
A BRAZILIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You enter into a partnership
with an American corporation. Soon you have 1000 cows and the American
corporation declares bankruptcy.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship them.
A TALIBAN ORGANIZATION: You have two cows. You load them up with explosives
and herd them onto your neighbour's property where you blow them up.Your
neighbour dies. You starve to death.
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