Quote:
Originally posted by wyldblyss
When I was young my mom went too far in the spanking department...she used a leather belt. There were many times where I was kept inside for days until the bleeding/swelling/bruising and welts went down enough for me to go outside. It was abuse, plain and simple. That was NOT spanking, that was a woman with a problem taking it out on an innocent child.
Having said that, i actually believe in "spanking" in CERTAIN situations. These situations have only come up less than 4 or 5 times each in my kids entire childhood.
They all got their first slap (yes ONE small slap on the behind, over their clothes) doing the same thing. What was it? Stepping on the road. First try "NO", second try "I SAID NO" third time...a slap. None of them ever stepped on the road again unless I took them on it by the hand. I have always reserved the slap for situations I felt were dangerous. The other normal childhood things, time-out in their rooms always worked fine.
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Wyldblyss, I agree and sympathize with you 100%. Sure my mom went overboard and I had many a bruise and welt. My dad on the other hand I obeyed MORE because he talked it out but let me know early on what a spanking was for. Yet I understand now when and why to use a spanking. My dad had a thing about if you are angry, don't spank. Cool off first. Spankings were reserved for if a kid did something dangerous. Other than that smacks and tugs and such were for reminders.
Back then people still shot one another for just looking at them wrong. So you had to have your social skills and sassing back meant a good one was coming.
Sure some parents do get out of hand and that's when the police and courts come in. Everything in good measure. Yet sometimes both sides of the fence can go overboard.
My nieces and nephews and godchildren NEVER act up when I'm around. I have mastered "The Look" and "The Glare" of 'no bullshittinus' and they snap to right there and then.