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Dude, as you attorney and advisor of lo these many years, I suggest you just sit on the couch and do bong hits. When the woman sticks her head and and says, "Why aren't you at the gym?", just hold up the bong a yell as loud as you can, "I AM at the fucking gym! The bong gym! Now go and make me some FUCKING PIE!" Then start speaking in tongues and roll around on the floor untill she gets off of that kick. It worked for me. I now weigh almost 400 pounds, and I'm high as a kite. Single tho. And I have no pie.
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