Shoehorn!

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I gotta' gal wears her toenails long,
Drives a red Barracuda, singin' meat packer songs,
And she ain't from Kalamazoo.

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I gotta' friend lived in a Mercedes-Benz,
Then a 55 Chrysler where the trunk never ends,
And the plates say Kalamazoo.

He had a steady job and watched what he spent,
He'd say I don't believe in payin' no goddamn rent,
I'll squirrel away every goddamn cent,
And buy my own damn house in Kalamazoo.

I knew a guy that mangled his hand,
And he went from pipe fittin' to a hot dog stand,
They say last year he cleared fifty grand,
Selling dogs round Kalamazoo.

She turned to the world with a bastard child,
Said, "I just can't handle him he's too damn wild,"
But the years and the liquor have made him mild,
And he lays around Kalamazoo.

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