My Trip to Venezuela (pics)

[Pipecrew]

First and Foremost. Venezuela is a beautiful country with quite possibly the most beautiful women on earth. You would see 12's out of 10's working on the side of the road selling cellphone minutes or working in markets etc. These girls are making the equivalent of 300 USD/month

However, it's quite possibly the most dangerous country ever. Imagine driving 3 miles away from your house and having to go through 3-4 military checkpoints within those 3 miles, the kind of checkpoints where guys with shotguns eye you down just wanting to make an example of you. Now multiply that by 5 times a day x everyday if you lived there. I couldn't get many pictures of the checkpoints, because they go crazy if you take their picture (I tried later and learned my lesson)

Airports: Fucking Chaos, I thought the US state department was exaggerating that Caracas was the most dangerous airport in the world, they weren't. Fake police officers, Cab drivers that will rob you and just general bad dudes, hang out at the airport.
I had to pay a "gringo" tax a few times just to get my bags safely out of that airport.

Driving
Imagine a place where you dont have any rules or stoplights that people obey for that matter. Imagine driving 150 km/hour whenever the fuck you want, imagine driving drunk and imagine being able to pass the police officers because if they pull you over, it costs you the equivalent to 10 USD to send them on their way. Sounds like fun right? No, it's fucking terrifying, for every 5 miles of road, you see 10-15 of these little grave sites where people have died in their car.

Money
For Every 1 USD you can buy about 6 bolivares. So multiply your money by 6, your pretty much a rockstar in this country for nothing.

Here are some Random Pics, I have tons of good ones, but I just picked like 20 random ones to post with a few comments here and there about each.


This is a taxi. Yes it really is, and it's a busy taxi. I have seen bigger pieces of shit driving around the road than this. Check the wild dogs hiding under this one.


This beach is called Sombrero, it's fucking sick, I ran around smashing cocunuts and snorkeling here all day.


I had really no idea beaches like this existed in Venezuela, so I was pleasantly surprised.


Me smashing and eating cocunuts.


Me riding one decrypt looking horse. I thought it would be easy or something, I was wrong. I remembered Christopher reeve and decided to get off while I still could.


I milked a cow! holla!, and it's not easy like I figured it would be.


I bought a shotgun because I couldn't believe how easy it was. Granted I had to give it away a few days later. I don't think Delta/US customs would be cool with me transporting that


I worked on a sugar kane farm for a little bit ;)


I caught a live chicken.


Ok I lied, this kid caught it for me and I just held it. They are fast as hell.


This guy saw me taking a picture of him from the backseat of a car (look at this face), he blew a whistle and stopped the car. I immediately pulled the memory card out of my camera and threw it on the floor. He demanded me give him the Camera. I resisted a little and asked why (bad idea) at this point buddy on the left with the machine gun came over to see what the commotion was about. I got pulled out of the car, roughed up a decent amount and they smashed my 300 dollar camera into about 16,000 pieces. But You know what? It's better than seeing my ass on "Pipecrew, Locked up abroad Venezuela" That show on national geographic.


Get used to seeing wild dogs everywhere in Venezuela!


Beautiful Atving out there, but look at the end of that road, No barriers. That basically means, you make a stupid mistake and you are dropping down the side of a mountain.



Imagine having to drive up a mountain in a car for 3 hours, then getting on an ATV and riding another 3 hours through trails, rivers, dangerous paths and finding sporadic small villages. i bought this kid and all his friends about a weeks supply worth of candy at their tiny general store (total cost, about 11 USD) and they were thrilled


My new buddies


I swear on my life, We are literally 6 hours up in the mountains, 100's of miles from civilization and these 2 guys approach me and start talking in fast spanish (i can communicate in slow spanish heh) and guess what they are? Jehovah's witnesses. These guys are EVERYWHERE! even the most peaceful beautiful places on earth.


This kid was hilarious, he was part of a mariachi band and he just kept pretending he was drunk in his mariachi outfit.




These were just a random sampling of pics, I have a lot more pics, I just put these ones up. All in All, I will definitely return to Venezuela, the people are incredibly nice and there is so much to do. Don't judge it by my pictures, it's not all farm country and crazy people ;)

[Spunky]

Looks very beautiful there,nice pix

[EscortBiz]

nice pics great stuff, overall thou walking in the street hows the security or you need private guys?

[»Rob Content«]

Fucking amazing

but uh, where are the pics of the hot women =)

[Pipecrew]

Originally Posted by EscortBiz

nice pics great stuff, overall thou walking in the street hows the security or you need private guys?

Depends on the city. I wouldn't dare walking in Caracas anywhere during the day, let alone nighttime. But I walked around total gringo style in other cities. Buying things from the locals, asking directions, meeting people etc.

http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_p.../cis_1059.html

- highest murder rates
- kidnapping considered a GNP ;)
- 0 police that give a shit.
- "Incidents of taxi drivers in Caracas overcharging, robbing, and injuring passengers are common"

[Miss Munki]

Wow, it really is beautiful there

[Pipecrew]

Originally Posted by »Rob Content«

Fucking amazing

but uh, where are the pics of the hot women =)

I was there with my own Venezuelan ;) if you know anything about latina women, Don't try and take pics of any others, they are extremely jealous. I will end up "express kidnapped" or beaten to a pulp by somebody.

[BVF]

Nice pics.....However, I'm too old to be getting roughed up and going through checkpoints and getting harrassed at the airport....I don't care how nice the people are...I've been through ALL of that and I'm tired of it.

Maybe it's because I have kids now and I want to have the highest chance of making it back home.

You can run around and smash coconuts and see friendly people in Belize without all the violence...

[F-U-Jimmy]

I went there 20 years ago and it sounds like its gotten worse not better. The hotels would rip you off and yes the airport was a cluster fuck I got chased by two armed guards with machine guns when I jumped over a barrier to get to British Airways office, there was no other way. Evidently they wanted everyone to travel Air Viasa (spelling ?) The worst Airline in the world. I had to stay 3 extra days as they had over booked my confirmed return flight to the UK by 80 seats.

Ended up costing that airline £3500 or $5000 for my double room and all the food I could eat or drink. Needless to say it was party time
Fucking retarded country i will never go back

PS the beaches are some of the best in the world

[Pipecrew]

Originally Posted by F-U-Jimmy

I went there 20 years ago and it sounds like its gotten worse not better. The hotels would rip you off and yes the airport was a cluster fuck I got chased by two armed guards with machine guns when I jumped over a barrier to get to British Airways office, there was no other way. Evidently they wanted everyone to travel Air Viasa (spelling ?) The worst Airline in the world. I had to stay 3 extra days as they had over booked my confirmed return flight to the UK by 80 seats.

Ended up costing that airline £3500 or $5000 for my double room and all the food I could eat or drink. Needless to say it was party time
Fucking retarded country i will never go back

Yeah they need to blow that airport up and start over.

My "carry on" bag was over 8lbs and it was a 150 USD dollar fine. Yes I said carry on, they weighed that shit. I threw out everything that want important and got it to 8.

Even though I booked my tickets via expedia, they kicked me to standby and did'nt even assign me a seat number. I had the possibility of having to wait for another plane.

You need to pay an Airport tax just to leave the country (you're not told about this until the last minute, works out to about 75 USD)

Huge lines, none of that auto checkin stuff we all know and love like the states have.

They now have a huge glass barrier that separates you from these kidnapping cab drivers. It's about 8.5 feet, and these guys are trying to climb over it and literally screaming at gringos saying "mr smith, the hotel sent me, i am your cab driver today" and if you don't respond they are like "mr johnson, the hotel sent me, i am your cab driver today" They try all the gringo last names, it must work.

[WiredGuy]

Sounds like fun but damn does it sound scary. What made you pick Venezula of all places? Considering the chances of getting killed, going to Iraq seemed safer, lol.
WG

[Chosen]

Great pics, thanks for sharing

[Pipecrew]

Originally Posted by WiredGuy

Sounds like fun but damn does it sound scary. What made you pick Venezula of all places? Considering the chances of getting killed, going to Iraq seemed safer, lol.
WG

GF is from there, but lives in Miami. We went for her birthday. I loved it and will definitely return. I just know what to do and where to go now ;) gotta always think positive.

[Budis]

amazing photos, can you give me link to a whole gallery? thanks.

[raven1083]

i was expecting women

[Drake]

Wicked pics

[Pornopat]

Awesome! I love Venezuela. You should check out Columbia as well.
Where are all the pics of all the gorgeous Latinas?

Edited : Ah nevermind...I see now you went there with a latina girlfriend. Enough said...lol

[tiger]

Awesome pics but I really wanted to see some of those 12's

[Pornwolf]

Why does everyone on this board who travels take picture of chickens and shit in exotic places.

Never any chicas. WTF?

Pipecrew, beautiful pics and funny stories, but I expected more from you bro. lol ;)

[ContentPimp]

Looks so beautiful over there, I watched Banged Up Abroad so I am very very scared to go there and get arrested for whatever the fuck they make up. Would love to goto Venezuela sometime though if it wasn't so damn scary.

[onlymovies]

Jordan, those are some awesome pics and i enjoyed the story behind 'em. After first I couldn't understand WTF you we're going there for. I knew it had to be a woman...haha. Only a woman can make a man cross the seas and land in a place where the threat of getting seriously hurt (or killed) looms around every corner. LOL

But sounds like you had an awesome experience man. I'm sure it must have added some perspective in your life..something everyone should experience.

...and you know those kids will remember that day for years and years! Probably the only time they'll see 11 bucks worth of candy in one sitting..

Good stuff man..

[voa]

Nice pictures you have here, hope some day i will visit some of this places

[bobby666]

lol jehovas are almost everywhere

[xenigo]

Great stories. I had some fucked up experiences dealing with the mexican police in Cancun... the gringo references brought those good old feelings back! I didn't experience the threat of much violence, but I certainly felt exploited everywhere I went. Put a strange new perspective on how good we have it living in the US. Previously boring Sacramento and the Bay Area now feel much more warm & cozy. Now I'm much more content vacationing closer to home, or in Hawaii. I put a much higher value on my safety than I did when I was younger.

[Elixir]

Weee looks like very cool trip

[Fucksakes]

you always have the best stories eh.. I remember reading your site daily just to see what your next story was, bullshit or not.

[pornguy]

Sounds like the border cities of Mexico.

and now with the idiot and the camera, you know the reason the people make about 300$ a month.

[DWB]

Kudos for going there! I love Venezuela and have spent a lot of time down there over the years, been all over that place. Dated a girl there who now works and travels with Chavez (she has no idea what I do for a living). She pulled rank for me once at the airport because they closed the gate on us and we were going to miss the flight. They held the plane, reopened the plane doors and gave us a police escort to the plane. lol

Great pics, makes me really miss the Andes. What city did you ATV in? Never done that there, I bet that is a blast! You make it to Los Llanos and do any anaconda hunting (not to kill)? Wild shit. They have wild shrooms that grow there right next to the waters where the anacondas are, so you can get FUCKED UP and hunt them if one were so inclined.

Post some more pics please, it's been a couple years since I've been down there and I'm really, really missing it.

And yes, the women here are probably the hottest on earth. Even hotter than Colombians, if that is even possible.

[tranza]

It seems you had a great time! The pics are very nice and that beach is amazing!!

[DWB]

Originally Posted by Pipecrew

I wouldn't dare walking in Caracas anywhere during the day, let alone nighttime. But I walked around total gringo style in other cities. Buying things from the locals, asking directions, meeting people etc.

http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_p.../cis_1059.html

- highest murder rates
- kidnapping considered a GNP ;)
- 0 police that give a shit.
- "Incidents of taxi drivers in Caracas overcharging, robbing, and injuring passengers are common"

My last trip there, we met up with another American down there and against my suggestion, he decided to go to the day market alone to get some fruit. He was gone for about 15 minutes and then I heard a knock on my door. I opened it and there he stood, beaten to a bloody pulp. He got rolled and robbed by several guys in broad daylight, in the middle of a packed market and nobody did anything to help. Rough stuff for sure. He is lucky he wasn't kidnapped or killed.

[Mickey_]

Culture shock, gotta love it. Interesting stories btw.

[Wizzo]

Its a awesome country, my Dad lived there for years until Chavez took power.

[GTS Mark]

You should have brought Cambo with you LOL! He thrives in places like that haha!

[Davy]

Cool stuff. Post some more pics.

[michael.kickass]

Looks like you had a great time!
Pics look great, thx for sharing! ;)

[Scott McD]

Great pics and an interesting read !!!!

[Jade509]

nice pics

[bbm]

Very nice pic

[Achmed's Wife Halimah]

Originally Posted by Pornwolf

Why does everyone on this board who travels take picture of chickens and shit in exotic places.

Never any chicas. WTF?

Pipecrew, beautiful pics and funny stories, but I expected more from you bro. lol ;)

maybe because his JOB IS CHICAS and he is on VACATION ?
or perhaps because this boy is hot & doesn't feel the need to justify himself to GFY webmasturbators posing with venezuela booty?

[fuzebox]

I hooked up with a Venezualan chick once and she was definitely one of the hottest ever...

Crazy about all the crime, violence, kidnapping, military presence etc. I've heard that Costa Rica is one of the safest latin american countries, but I've never travelled to any others to prove it.

So was the pic you took of the military guy the last one?

[BlackCrayon]

wheres the pics of the latina girlfriend?

[woj]

looks like a fun trip

[slapass]

Originally Posted by DirtyWhiteBoy

And yes, the women here are probably the hottest on earth. Even hotter than Colombians, if that is even possible.

Better then Brazil?

Pipecrew you need to work on that latin gf thing. Sure you get all that weird jealousy stuff but her brothers won't wack you for looking at girls. They are more likely to take you to the local whore house. One of the joys of the latin culture is that men get to do what ever they want.

[Horny Dude]

Originally Posted by »Rob Content«

Fucking amazing

but uh, where are the pics of the hot women =)

LOL....I was just going to ask the same thing.

[alias]

Originally Posted by fuzebox

So was the pic you took of the military guy the last one?

I was wondering the same thing. Cool pictures, the beach looks awesome.

[Jakke PNG]

Originally Posted by Pipecrew

Driving
Imagine a place where you dont have any rules or stoplights that people obey for that matter. Imagine driving 150 km/hour whenever the fuck you want...

Ohhhh.. You were in Italy? Sounds like it ;)

Looking like it was quite the experience, must have been nice. Must be nice to return to the safety of home too.

[hypedough]

That last kid is great, awesome gimmick for a mariachi band!

[dready]

Awesome pics. Thanks for sharing!

[GoNe]

Very nice pictures. Thanks for sharing. I'm going to try and visit Venezuela soon.

[fuzebox]

Originally Posted by slapass

Better then Brazil?

Brazil is like #6 on the list