My experience shopping for a porn DVD... TRAINWRECK - GoFuckYourself.com

brentbacardi · 07-23-2011, 03:36 PM

So for those of you who didn't know... I had some legal issues a while back. During this time, it was best for me to not use the internet for anything other then basic, non adult type activities. But I love porn, my girlfriend loves porn and we didn't know what to do... so we thought about buying a porn dvd or two or three... We had no idea what to expect...

My only experience with porn dvds was a dvd my friend brought back from Poland when I was in like 5th grade... thats about it, internet porn only.

So we go to an adult store, which we frequent regularly (like once a month just looking for fun shit, or just to look around and bang at home after).

We know out of all the local places, which the one with the biggest and most updated DVD section is. We look around, all different stuff... we both mostly like 2girls 1guy threesomes... first off, there are very few dvds of that genre, everyone must really be into black on white gangbangs, amateur,and all sorts of weird shit but seriously there is only like 2 dvds out of a HUGE wall of dvds with what we really want... so we say fuck it...

We then decide to get a girl on girl flick... which there are substantially more to choose from. 95% of the dvds have hairy muffs, insane toy action, ugly ass chicks... etc... we just want a dvd with 2-3 cute girls from the cut scenes on the back (ie 18-25, in shape, nice boobs, long hair) now is that too much to ask for? We find one that looks ok and almost bought it until I being smart and know about recycled aged clips looks at the date of production and its like 1998 or something... so I say fuck that....

We find another one that looks ok from what it states as 2009.... get it home, pop it in, its a bunch of clips from 90s early 00s which was mixed together in 2009... but it says that NO WHERE ON THE BOX... and btw, it shows NO PUSSY! Yeah, they purposely cut out all the pussy shots... yet it doesn't say its softcore or anything like that on the cover either...

So we try another store the next day.... we find a multiple girl on guy scenario type dvd and its not too old so we bring it home along with a few other random ones i picked out on my own (2 bj dvds)... its pretty good EXCEPT EVERY TIME THE GUY GETS OFF IT IS ON HIS FACE THE WHOLE TIME AND HES GOING "UGGGG OHHH UUHHHH OWHEEEE" for like 3 minutes I kid you not! We like girl/girl/guy because we like girls... we dont want to see the guy like that... so I said lets try the ones I got.... one had ugly ass girls and I could not find the girls on the cover anywhere in the DVD... the other had ONE good scene, the rest were useless ie shadows covered the action, like get a fucking light... and shit....

Besides all this all the DVDs were like $30+, huge waste! If I was going to try it again, I would get a mainstream release from a huge company but we didn't do that because they were like $60+ and thats fucking ridiculous for a fuckin dvd...

So no wonder the porn DVD is dead... R.I.P.!

SallyRand · 07-23-2011, 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brentbacardi

So for those of you who didn't know... I had some legal issues a while back. During this time, it was best for me to not use the internet for anything other then basic, non adult type activities. But I love porn, my girlfriend loves porn and we didn't know what to do... so we thought about buying a porn dvd or two or three... We had no idea what to expect...

My only experience with porn dvds was a dvd my friend brought back from Poland when I was in like 5th grade... thats about it, internet porn only.

So we go to an adult store, which we frequent regularly (like once a month just looking for fun shit, or just to look around and bang at home after).

We know out of all the local places, which the one with the biggest and most updated DVD section is. We look around, all different stuff... we both mostly like 2girls 1guy threesomes... first off, there are very few dvds of that genre, everyone must really be into black on white gangbangs, amateur,and all sorts of weird shit but seriously there is only like 2 dvds out of a HUGE wall of dvds with what we really want... so we say fuck it...

We then decide to get a girl on girl flick... which there are substantially more to choose from. 95% of the dvds have hairy muffs, insane toy action, ugly ass chicks... etc... we just want a dvd with 2-3 cute girls from the cut scenes on the back (ie 18-25, in shape, nice boobs, long hair) now is that too much to ask for? We find one that looks ok and almost bought it until I being smart and know about recycled aged clips looks at the date of production and its like 1998 or something... so I say fuck that....

We find another one that looks ok from what it states as 2009.... get it home, pop it in, its a bunch of clips from 90s early 00s which was mixed together in 2009... but it says that NO WHERE ON THE BOX... and btw, it shows NO PUSSY! Yeah, they purposely cut out all the pussy shots... yet it doesn't say its softcore or anything like that on the cover either...

So we try another store the next day.... we find a multiple girl on guy scenario type dvd and its not too old so we bring it home along with a few other random ones i picked out on my own (2 bj dvds)... its pretty good EXCEPT EVERY TIME THE GUY GETS OFF IT IS ON HIS FACE THE WHOLE TIME AND HES GOING "UGGGG OHHH UUHHHH OWHEEEE" for like 3 minutes I kid you not! We like girl/girl/guy because we like girls... we dont want to see the guy like that... so I said lets try the ones I got.... one had ugly ass girls and I could not find the girls on the cover anywhere in the DVD... the other had ONE good scene, the rest were useless ie shadows covered the action, like get a fucking light... and shit....

Besides all this all the DVDs were like $30+, huge waste! If I was going to try it again, I would get a mainstream release from a huge company but we didn't do that because they were like $60+ and thats fucking ridiculous for a fuckin dvd...

So no wonder the porn DVD is dead... R.I.P.!

So you a spammer, a scammer, a pirate, a stalker, a domain thief...................what?

What your "legal issues"?

Tell us!

GFY WANTS TO KNOW!

You wrote:

"So for those of you who didn't know... I had some legal issues a while back. During this time, it was best for me to not use the internet for anything other then basic, non adult type activities. But I love porn, my girlfriend loves porn and we didn't know what to do... so we thought about buying a porn dvd or two or three... We had no idea what to expect..."

Mutt · 07-23-2011, 03:42 PM

buy DVD's from Evil Angel - you won't be disappointed.

u can buy DVD's that you can download immediately and burn to a disc - think all the big VOD sites offer that option.

L-Pink · 07-23-2011, 03:43 PM

Make your own.

L-Pink · 07-23-2011, 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SallyRand

So you a spammer, a scammer, a pirate, a stalker, a domain thief...................what?

What your "legal issues"?

Looking for a partner?

.

babymaker · 07-23-2011, 03:51 PM

Offline porn sux big time, i worked in it for a bit in the late 90's even then it sucked. I know a few porn shops now, they dont even make money on dvds just backrooms and mags, mags actually do good now those really crappy ghetto mags with really bad pics with some crappy title that was typeset on a actual machine in like the 70's :D

brentbacardi · 07-23-2011, 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SallyRand

So you a spammer, a scammer, a pirate, a stalker, a domain thief...................what?

What your "legal issues"?

Tell us!

GFY WANTS TO KNOW!

Um I actually posted a whole thread of it but if anyone is one of those things you posted it may be yourself...

brentbacardi · 07-23-2011, 03:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by L-Pink

Make your own.

Hahah yeah thats exactly what I couldn't do....

Agent 488 · 07-23-2011, 04:06 PM

porn sucks i agree.

Agent 488 · 07-23-2011, 04:07 PM

and paul markham's shit even worse so that's no solution. his generation inspired the abomination that is porn today with their ridiculous fake bullshit.

SallyRand · 07-23-2011, 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brentbacardi

Um I actually posted a whole thread of it but if anyone is one of those things you posted it may be yourself...

So link to it and save us the trouble of the search.................................

brentbacardi · 07-23-2011, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SallyRand

So link to it and save us the trouble of the search.................................

https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=1029297

07-23-2011, 03:36 PM	#1
brentbacardi Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1,425	My experience shopping for a porn DVD... TRAINWRECK So for those of you who didn't know... I had some legal issues a while back. During this time, it was best for me to not use the internet for anything other then basic, non adult type activities. But I love porn, my girlfriend loves porn and we didn't know what to do... so we thought about buying a porn dvd or two or three... We had no idea what to expect... My only experience with porn dvds was a dvd my friend brought back from Poland when I was in like 5th grade... thats about it, internet porn only. So we go to an adult store, which we frequent regularly (like once a month just looking for fun shit, or just to look around and bang at home after). We know out of all the local places, which the one with the biggest and most updated DVD section is. We look around, all different stuff... we both mostly like 2girls 1guy threesomes... first off, there are very few dvds of that genre, everyone must really be into black on white gangbangs, amateur,and all sorts of weird shit but seriously there is only like 2 dvds out of a HUGE wall of dvds with what we really want... so we say fuck it... We then decide to get a girl on girl flick... which there are substantially more to choose from. 95% of the dvds have hairy muffs, insane toy action, ugly ass chicks... etc... we just want a dvd with 2-3 cute girls from the cut scenes on the back (ie 18-25, in shape, nice boobs, long hair) now is that too much to ask for? We find one that looks ok and almost bought it until I being smart and know about recycled aged clips looks at the date of production and its like 1998 or something... so I say fuck that.... We find another one that looks ok from what it states as 2009.... get it home, pop it in, its a bunch of clips from 90s early 00s which was mixed together in 2009... but it says that NO WHERE ON THE BOX... and btw, it shows NO PUSSY! Yeah, they purposely cut out all the pussy shots... yet it doesn't say its softcore or anything like that on the cover either... So we try another store the next day.... we find a multiple girl on guy scenario type dvd and its not too old so we bring it home along with a few other random ones i picked out on my own (2 bj dvds)... its pretty good EXCEPT EVERY TIME THE GUY GETS OFF IT IS ON HIS FACE THE WHOLE TIME AND HES GOING "UGGGG OHHH UUHHHH OWHEEEE" for like 3 minutes I kid you not! We like girl/girl/guy because we like girls... we dont want to see the guy like that... so I said lets try the ones I got.... one had ugly ass girls and I could not find the girls on the cover anywhere in the DVD... the other had ONE good scene, the rest were useless ie shadows covered the action, like get a fucking light... and shit.... Besides all this all the DVDs were like $30+, huge waste! If I was going to try it again, I would get a mainstream release from a huge company but we didn't do that because they were like $60+ and thats fucking ridiculous for a fuckin dvd... So no wonder the porn DVD is dead... R.I.P.! __________________ Go Fuck Yourself!

07-23-2011, 03:42 PM	#3
Mutt Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 34,431	buy DVD's from Evil Angel - you won't be disappointed. u can buy DVD's that you can download immediately and burn to a disc - think all the big VOD sites offer that option. __________________ I moved my sites to Vacares Hosting. I've saved money, my hair is thicker, lost some weight too! Thanks Sly!

07-23-2011, 03:51 PM	#6
babymaker Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: philly Posts: 4,751	Offline porn sux big time, i worked in it for a bit in the late 90's even then it sucked. I know a few porn shops now, they dont even make money on dvds just backrooms and mags, mags actually do good now those really crappy ghetto mags with really bad pics with some crappy title that was typeset on a actual machine in like the 70's :D __________________ $99mo Hosted CMS From ElevatedX! ICQ 293125596

07-23-2011, 03:43 PM	#4
L-Pink working on my tan Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Florida/Kentucky Posts: 39,151	Make your own.

07-23-2011, 04:06 PM	#9
Agent 488 Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 22,511	porn sucks i agree.

07-23-2011, 04:07 PM	#10
Agent 488 Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 22,511	and paul markham's shit even worse so that's no solution. his generation inspired the abomination that is porn today with their ridiculous fake bullshit.