REDNECKS!!! Yes, the new one is out! Brand new edition of..... - GoFuckYourself.com

DonX · 08-05-2011, 09:09 AM

You got to love the Rednecks!!!!

Yes, the new one is out! Brand new edition of..

"You know you're a redneck when......

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.

3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

5. You think "The Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.

6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.

7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.

8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.

14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog

15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.

16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

17. You have a rag for a gas cap.

18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

19. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-room's so clean ?

20. You can spit without opening your mouth.

21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it..

22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.

24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.

25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.

26. You've used your ironing boar d as a buffet table.

27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.

28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.

29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.

Have a great weekend everyone!!!

cherrylula · 08-05-2011, 09:16 AM

Well written, by a non-redneck who can laugh at rednecks, but not with them. And no true redneck would follow all those things. I should write my own. LOL

While from Los Angeles, I now live in Louisiana. There be rednecks.

08-05-2011, 09:09 AM	#1
DonX Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: San Jose, California Posts: 1,917	REDNECKS!!! Yes, the new one is out! Brand new edition of..... You got to love the Rednecks!!!! Yes, the new one is out! Brand new edition of.. "You know you're a redneck when...... 1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree. 2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter. 3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years. 4. You burn your yard rather than mow it. 5. You think "The Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive. 6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture. 7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it. 8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial. 9. You come back from the dump with more than you took. 10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table. 11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat. 12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list. 13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower. 14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog 15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program. 16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold. 17. You have a rag for a gas cap. 18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does. 19. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-room's so clean ? 20. You can spit without opening your mouth. 21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.. 22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand. 23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side. 24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart. 25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV. 26. You've used your ironing boar d as a buffet table. 27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements. 28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back. 29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty. 30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65. Have a great weekend everyone!!! __________________ Monkey Spanking Cash 50/50 Rev Share Program DonX: 300599159 Galleries Click Here

08-05-2011, 09:16 AM	#2
cherrylula lol Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Posts: 15,969	Well written, by a non-redneck who can laugh at rednecks, but not with them. And no true redneck would follow all those things. I should write my own. LOL While from Los Angeles, I now live in Louisiana. There be rednecks.