From the I can't believe that shit department - GoFuckYourself.com

Gozarian · 08-13-2012, 05:01 PM

From the I can't believe that shit department. Don't know if true but funny as hell

A Wash DC 'airport ticket agent' offers some examples of why the US is in so much trouble!

1.I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)

2. I got a call from a Kansas Congressman's (Moore) staffer (Howard Bauleke), who wanted to go to Cape Town. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, and then he interrupted me with, ''I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Cape Town is in Massachusetts ..''

Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained, ''Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Cape Town is in South Africa.''
His response -- click..

3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.

He replied, 'Don't lie to me!, I looked on the map, and Florida is a very THIN state!!'' (OMG)

4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife (Landra Reid) who asked, ''Is it possible to see England from Canada ?''

I said, ''No.''

She said, ''But they look so close on the map'' (OMG, again!)

5. An aide for a cabinet member (Janet Napolitano) once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas .. I pulled up the reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas ... When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ''I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time.'' (Arrrrrghhhh)

6. An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.

I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.

7. A New York lawmaker, (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, ''Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?'' I said, 'No, why do you ask?'

He replied, ''Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!''

After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it. (I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on his luggage..

8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, ''Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii ?''

9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby Bright from Ala. who asked, ''How do I know which plane to get on?''

I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ''I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.''

10 Senator Dianne Feinstein called and said, ''I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?''

I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola and fly on a commuter plane.

She said, ''Yeah, whatever, smarty!''

11 Mary Landrieu, La. Senator, called and had a question about the documents she needed in order to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded her that she needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.''

I double checked and sure enough, her stay required a visa. When I told her this she said, ''Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!''

12 A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make reservations, ''I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .''

I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, ''Are you sure that's the name of the town?''

'Yes, what flights do you have?'' replied the man.

After some searching, I came back with, ''I'm sorry, sir, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a rhino anywhere."

''The man retorted, ''Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!''

So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, ''You don't mean Buffalo , do you?''

The reply? ''Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.''

Now you know why the Government is in the shape it's in!

Could ANYONE be this DUMB?

YES, THEY WALK AMONG US, ARE IN POLITICS, AND THEY CONTINUE TO BREED.

Babaganoosh · 08-13-2012, 05:05 PM

The only people dumber are the ones who post email forwards they got from their Grandma on GFY.

Juicy D. Links · 08-13-2012, 05:09 PM

Sureeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

CyberHustler · 08-13-2012, 05:11 PM

garce · 08-13-2012, 05:14 PM

Does Snopes still exist? I haven't checked that place in years...

baryl · 08-13-2012, 05:17 PM

Clearly it's true because it was on the internet.

Here's a true story:
German friend of mine asked if I could drive over and pick up some stuff for him really quick in Washington DC. (I live in Las Vegas)

sarettah · 08-13-2012, 05:29 PM

http://urbanlegends.about.com/od/gov...cket-Agent.htm

http://www.snopes.com/travel/trap/congress.asp

.

Gozarian · 08-13-2012, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Babaganoosh

The only people dumber are the ones who post email forwards they got from their Grandma on GFY.

eat me
fuck boy

Sly · 08-13-2012, 05:38 PM

I have a hard time believing a congressman would make a personal call for those issues. They have assistants for that.

ShoeBox · 08-13-2012, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sly

I have a hard time believing a congressman would make a personal call for those issues. They have assistants for that.

True Story

woj · 08-13-2012, 06:17 PM

sounds to ridiculous to be true..

ilnjscb · 08-13-2012, 06:28 PM

Is this the same DC airport where:

3. An agent fell asleep and couldn't be awakened and planes had to land themselves by radio (WTF!?!)
2. Two planes were within 12 seconds of crashing before they were diverted (LOLZ!!)
1. Michelle Obama was nearly in a plane crash landing (OMG!!)

Whoever made up that stuff OP posted was an idiot, the stuff above is true.

What puzzles me is why anyone would need to make up stuff about politicians - their actual behavior is humorous enough.

ottopottomouse · 08-14-2012, 03:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by garce

Does Snopes still exist? I haven't checked that place in years...

Snopes never existed. It was as much of a hoax as the emails.

Axzar · 08-14-2012, 03:55 AM

Moral of the story? Don't be an uninformed douche.

EddyTheDog · 08-14-2012, 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sly

I have a hard time believing a congressman would make a personal call for those issues. They have assistants for that.

They have assistants because they would come out with crap like that....

DamageX · 08-14-2012, 04:05 AM

While the ones posted above are clearly fake, this one is real:

seeandsee · 08-14-2012, 04:51 AM

i loled if this is real :D

08-13-2012, 05:01 PM	#1
Gozarian Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2012 Location: most recently Bucharest Posts: 558	From the I can't believe that shit department From the I can't believe that shit department. Don't know if true but funny as hell A Wash DC 'airport ticket agent' offers some examples of why the US is in so much trouble! 1.I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!) 2. I got a call from a Kansas Congressman's (Moore) staffer (Howard Bauleke), who wanted to go to Cape Town. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, and then he interrupted me with, ''I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Cape Town is in Massachusetts ..'' Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained, ''Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Cape Town is in South Africa.'' His response -- click.. 3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, 'Don't lie to me!, I looked on the map, and Florida is a very THIN state!!'' (OMG) 4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife (Landra Reid) who asked, ''Is it possible to see England from Canada ?'' I said, ''No.'' She said, ''But they look so close on the map'' (OMG, again!) 5. An aide for a cabinet member (Janet Napolitano) once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas .. I pulled up the reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas ... When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ''I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time.'' (Arrrrrghhhh) 6. An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that. 7. A New York lawmaker, (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, ''Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?'' I said, 'No, why do you ask?' He replied, ''Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!'' After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it. (I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on his luggage.. 8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, ''Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii ?'' 9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby Bright from Ala. who asked, ''How do I know which plane to get on?'' I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ''I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.'' 10 Senator Dianne Feinstein called and said, ''I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?'' I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola and fly on a commuter plane. She said, ''Yeah, whatever, smarty!'' 11 Mary Landrieu, La. Senator, called and had a question about the documents she needed in order to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded her that she needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.'' I double checked and sure enough, her stay required a visa. When I told her this she said, ''Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!'' 12 A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make reservations, ''I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .'' I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, ''Are you sure that's the name of the town?'' 'Yes, what flights do you have?'' replied the man. After some searching, I came back with, ''I'm sorry, sir, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a rhino anywhere." ''The man retorted, ''Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!'' So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, ''You don't mean Buffalo , do you?'' The reply? ''Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.'' Now you know why the Government is in the shape it's in! Could ANYONE be this DUMB? YES, THEY WALK AMONG US, ARE IN POLITICS, AND THEY CONTINUE TO BREED.

08-13-2012, 05:05 PM	#2
Babaganoosh ♥♥♥ Likes Hugs ♥♥♥ Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: /home Posts: 15,841	The only people dumber are the ones who post email forwards they got from their Grandma on GFY. __________________ I like pie.

08-13-2012, 05:17 PM	#6
baryl Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 1,086	Clearly it's true because it was on the internet. Here's a true story: German friend of mine asked if I could drive over and pick up some stuff for him really quick in Washington DC. (I live in Las Vegas) Last edited by baryl; 08-13-2012 at 05:19 PM..

08-13-2012, 05:29 PM	#7
sarettah see you later, I'm gone Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 14,053	http://urbanlegends.about.com/od/gov...cket-Agent.htm http://www.snopes.com/travel/trap/congress.asp . __________________ All cookies cleared!

08-13-2012, 05:38 PM	#9
Sly Let's do some business! Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 31,288	I have a hard time believing a congressman would make a personal call for those issues. They have assistants for that. __________________ Vacares - Web Hosting, Domains, O365, Security & More - Paxum and BTC Accepted Wanted: CCBill pay sites for sale

08-13-2012, 05:09 PM	#3
Juicy D. Links So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: N.Y. -Long Island -- Posts: 122,992	Sureeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

08-13-2012, 05:11 PM	#4
CyberHustler So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 25,214

08-13-2012, 05:14 PM	#5
garce Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Toronto Posts: 7,103	Does Snopes still exist? I haven't checked that place in years...

08-13-2012, 06:17 PM	#11
woj <&(©¿©)&> Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Chicago Posts: 47,882	sounds to ridiculous to be true.. __________________ Custom Software Development, email: woj#at#wojfun#.#com to discuss details or skype: wojl2000 or gchat: wojfun or telegram: wojl2000 Affiliate program tools: Hosted Galleries Manager Banner Manager Video Manager Wordpress Affiliate Plugin Pic/Movie of the Day Fansign Generator Zip Manager

08-13-2012, 06:28 PM	#12
ilnjscb Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 8,785	Is this the same DC airport where: 3. An agent fell asleep and couldn't be awakened and planes had to land themselves by radio (WTF!?!) 2. Two planes were within 12 seconds of crashing before they were diverted (LOLZ!!) 1. Michelle Obama was nearly in a plane crash landing (OMG!!) Whoever made up that stuff OP posted was an idiot, the stuff above is true. What puzzles me is why anyone would need to make up stuff about politicians - their actual behavior is humorous enough.

08-14-2012, 03:55 AM	#14
Axzar Random Jackass Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 1,837	Moral of the story? Don't be an uninformed douche.

08-14-2012, 04:05 AM	#16
DamageX Marketing & Strategy Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Former nomad Posts: 14,293	While the ones posted above are clearly fake, this one is real: __________________ Whitehat is for chumps If you don't do it, somebody else will - true story!

08-14-2012, 04:51 AM	#17
seeandsee Check SIG! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Europe (Skype: gojkoas) Posts: 50,945	i loled if this is real :D __________________ BUY MY SIG - 50$/Year Contact here