Can a Porn Star Teach You How to Cook? - GoFuckYourself.com

Arnox · 07-22-2013, 07:38 PM

James Deen, a man who is famous for being able to have sex with a woman on camera without looking as though he wants to kill her, has quietly been making short videos about food for porn site Wood Rocket since the beginning of the year. (Though the rest of the site is NSFW, "James Deen Loves Food" never exceeds PG-13 levels of suggestiveness.) Jezebel discovered the series last week and deemed it "A-Fucking-Dorable." But can Deen show you how to make a decent meal?

Absolutely not. Despite being repeatedly described in the media as a “cooking show,” “James Deen Loves Food” involves almost no cooking whatsoever. Of the 18 episodes Deen has released, only three involve preparing food in a kitchen, and zero involve what might be called practical cooking. In the first cooking episode, Deen watches Ben Fernebok, the owner of a company called Nitro Dreams, make ice cream and a frozen cocktail using liquid nitrogen. (This episode opens with a disclaimer: “Please don’t try what you’re about to see at home”—unusual for a cooking show.) In the second cooking episode, Deen makes “the most expensive burrito in the world,” containing brie, caviar, lobster, filet mignon, and Alaskan king crab legs, among other ingredients, all doused in copious amounts of scotch. (“The caviar was a terrible idea,” Deen reports after removing his shirt to dig into the overstuffed burrito.) In the third cooking episode—easily the most useful and innovative of the three—Deen and a friend make “the turducken dog of independence,” a Fourth of July riff on the turducken, consisting of a turkey hot dog encased in a chicken sausage wrapped in a duck paillard, all of which is then breaded and deep-fried.

Deen takes off his shirt in that episode, too. (Also his pants.) He also frequently curses, belches, smears food all over his face, and talks with his mouth full. The self-confidence that serves him so well in his day job reads as arrogance here. In several episodes, Deen visits restaurants, orders far more food than he can eat by himself, and bluntly critiques it in front of the proprietor; this shtick comes across as simply ungracious. (At a Las Vegas establishment, he complains repeatedly about not having received an oyster fork.) Worse, in a couple of episodes, Deen visits drive-through fast-food joints and orders everything on the menu, which is not only excruciatingly boring but also makes one feel sorry for the minimum-wage drudges tasked with executing his order. Not a-fucking-dorable. “James Deen Loves Food” seems predicated on the idea that all of its viewers love Deen and would happily watch him do anything at all, including spilling chili on the ground in front of a dumpster, sticking out his tongue and squeezing ketchup onto it, and dissecting a McRib sandwich. (Of course, it’s not a coincidence that these exploits echo the mess and vulgarity of mainstream porn—but porn aesthetics don’t necessarily translate well in the kitchen.)

There is one segment that succeeds, though, and happily, it’s one of the most frequently occurring features of the show. In “Hungry for Justice,” Deen appears in a set made to look like a prison cell, complete with a bare-bones cot and a toilet, and re-enacts the last meals of famous death row inmates like John Wayne Gacy, Timothy McVeigh, and Ted Bundy. Deen rates each meal’s deliciousness on a scale ranging from tort to felony. This sounds tasteless, and it is—but there’s something perversely compelling about watching a porn star sitting on a toilet while talking about violent crime and stuffing his face.

http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor..._reviewed.html

Phoenix · 07-22-2013, 07:42 PM

hmm no..but ariel rebel..yes...haha

pornmasta · 07-22-2013, 08:06 PM

For yout title: why not ?

$5 submissions · 07-22-2013, 08:11 PM

Sure, why not? People have many different sides and passions. Our work does not define us.

Colmike9 · 07-22-2013, 08:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phoenix

hmm no..but ariel rebel..yes...haha

I was going to say that.

Supz · 07-22-2013, 09:01 PM

maybe crack.

Dankasaur · 07-22-2013, 09:22 PM

+1 for Ariel Rebel.

Choopa_Pardo · 07-23-2013, 06:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dankasaur

+1 for Ariel Rebel.

She cook bacon in the nude. She is the bravest woman on Earth.

mopek1 · 07-23-2013, 06:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arnox

without looking as though he wants to kill her,

Why many women like the new art-type porn.

RebelR · 07-23-2013, 06:38 AM

sure, but if he says he's adding some "secret sauce" you may not want to eat it.

Black All Through · 07-23-2013, 07:04 AM

I once knew a prostitute in London that cooked the best meals ever

Jman · 07-23-2013, 07:24 AM

Love to cook da sausage ;)

rhon23 · 07-23-2013, 07:39 AM

I love the series. Woodrocket has a lot of good stuff on there.

privatesociety · 07-23-2013, 07:42 AM

Mariah Milano does this also

Sarah_Jayne · 07-23-2013, 09:09 AM

Not sure why having sex on camera would mean you don't know how to cook. I'd watch. He is pretty much the only porn guy I see everyday who doesn't make me turn away.

Sarah_Jayne · 07-23-2013, 09:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Black All Through

I once knew a prostitute in London that cooked the best meals ever

That sounds like a Leonard Cohen lyric.

Paper_Amar · 07-23-2013, 09:19 AM

have seen a ton of those pornstar doing these cooking things - just to get views on youtube? WTF?

_Richard_ · 07-23-2013, 09:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Choopa_Pardo

She cook bacon in the nude. She is the bravest woman on Earth.

Wizzo · 07-23-2013, 09:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by privatesociety

Mariah Milano does this also

CDSmith · 07-23-2013, 09:41 AM

He taught me how to throw a hotdog down a hallway.

Does that count?

Sly · 07-23-2013, 09:45 AM

A lot of that review just seems like whining. I have not seen the videos by James, but based on the descriptions above, a lot of those same exact things are done on Food Network shows all the time.

Sarah_Jayne · 07-23-2013, 10:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paper_Amar

have seen a ton of those pornstar doing these cooking things - just to get views on youtube? WTF?

Self promotion in the entertainment industry? Shocking.

pornguy · 07-23-2013, 01:18 PM

One of the very best Chef's that I know is Ana Mancini. She can cook to die for. and looks damn good doing it.

Aidoru · 07-23-2013, 07:52 PM

I learned how to cook with Coolio

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2sUKmj-OJaw

Zuzana Designs · 07-23-2013, 08:15 PM

One of biggest passions in life is to cook/bake.

Arnox · 07-23-2013, 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sarah_Jayne

Self promotion in the entertainment industry? Shocking.

It's almost like exposure and building a fanbase is a good thing!

ArielRebel · 07-30-2013, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dankasaur

+1 for Ariel Rebel.

aww I'm flattered

07-22-2013, 07:38 PM	#1
Arnox Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Radelaide Posts: 2,163	Can a Porn Star Teach You How to Cook? James Deen, a man who is famous for being able to have sex with a woman on camera without looking as though he wants to kill her, has quietly been making short videos about food for porn site Wood Rocket since the beginning of the year. (Though the rest of the site is NSFW, "James Deen Loves Food" never exceeds PG-13 levels of suggestiveness.) Jezebel discovered the series last week and deemed it "A-Fucking-Dorable." But can Deen show you how to make a decent meal? Absolutely not. Despite being repeatedly described in the media as a “cooking show,” “James Deen Loves Food” involves almost no cooking whatsoever. Of the 18 episodes Deen has released, only three involve preparing food in a kitchen, and zero involve what might be called practical cooking. In the first cooking episode, Deen watches Ben Fernebok, the owner of a company called Nitro Dreams, make ice cream and a frozen cocktail using liquid nitrogen. (This episode opens with a disclaimer: “Please don’t try what you’re about to see at home”—unusual for a cooking show.) In the second cooking episode, Deen makes “the most expensive burrito in the world,” containing brie, caviar, lobster, filet mignon, and Alaskan king crab legs, among other ingredients, all doused in copious amounts of scotch. (“The caviar was a terrible idea,” Deen reports after removing his shirt to dig into the overstuffed burrito.) In the third cooking episode—easily the most useful and innovative of the three—Deen and a friend make “the turducken dog of independence,” a Fourth of July riff on the turducken, consisting of a turkey hot dog encased in a chicken sausage wrapped in a duck paillard, all of which is then breaded and deep-fried. Deen takes off his shirt in that episode, too. (Also his pants.) He also frequently curses, belches, smears food all over his face, and talks with his mouth full. The self-confidence that serves him so well in his day job reads as arrogance here. In several episodes, Deen visits restaurants, orders far more food than he can eat by himself, and bluntly critiques it in front of the proprietor; this shtick comes across as simply ungracious. (At a Las Vegas establishment, he complains repeatedly about not having received an oyster fork.) Worse, in a couple of episodes, Deen visits drive-through fast-food joints and orders everything on the menu, which is not only excruciatingly boring but also makes one feel sorry for the minimum-wage drudges tasked with executing his order. Not a-fucking-dorable. “James Deen Loves Food” seems predicated on the idea that all of its viewers love Deen and would happily watch him do anything at all, including spilling chili on the ground in front of a dumpster, sticking out his tongue and squeezing ketchup onto it, and dissecting a McRib sandwich. (Of course, it’s not a coincidence that these exploits echo the mess and vulgarity of mainstream porn—but porn aesthetics don’t necessarily translate well in the kitchen.) There is one segment that succeeds, though, and happily, it’s one of the most frequently occurring features of the show. In “Hungry for Justice,” Deen appears in a set made to look like a prison cell, complete with a bare-bones cot and a toilet, and re-enacts the last meals of famous death row inmates like John Wayne Gacy, Timothy McVeigh, and Ted Bundy. Deen rates each meal’s deliciousness on a scale ranging from tort to felony. This sounds tasteless, and it is—but there’s something perversely compelling about watching a porn star sitting on a toilet while talking about violent crime and stuffing his face. http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor..._reviewed.html __________________ Need Text? X Copywriters \| Adult Writing Service - [email protected]

07-22-2013, 07:42 PM	#2
Phoenix BACON BACON BACON Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Poems everybody, the laddie fancies himself a poet Posts: 35,457	hmm no..but ariel rebel..yes...haha __________________ Skype Phoenixskype1 Telegram PhoenixBrad https://quantads.io

07-22-2013, 08:11 PM	#4
$5 submissions I help you SUCCEED Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The Pearl of the Orient Seas Posts: 32,195	Sure, why not? People have many different sides and passions. Our work does not define us. __________________ Need a NON-ADULT income stream? We build your YOUTUBE CHANNEL for only $20 per video! For Hire: $3/hour or $400 per month Marketing Specialist Virtual Assistants

07-23-2013, 06:38 AM	#10
RebelR Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Across the river Styx Posts: 1,998	sure, but if he says he's adding some "secret sauce" you may not want to eat it. __________________ Rich"at"rebel-ads.com ICQ 644377336 or MSN ruralx"at"hotmail.com

07-23-2013, 07:04 AM	#11
Black All Through Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: US Posts: 2,078	I once knew a prostitute in London that cooked the best meals ever __________________ I want to buy contextual links on quality blogs For both Adult and mainstream niche - Small to massive packages

07-22-2013, 08:06 PM	#3
pornmasta Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 19,208	For yout title: why not ?

07-22-2013, 09:01 PM	#6
Supz Arthur Flegenheimer Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: New York City Posts: 11,056	maybe crack.

07-22-2013, 09:22 PM	#7
Dankasaur So Fucking Fossilized Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2011 Posts: 1,432	+1 for Ariel Rebel.

07-23-2013, 07:24 AM	#12
Jman Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Canuckstikan Posts: 22,764	Love to cook da sausage ;) __________________ email: [email protected] Best AI Affiliate Program We also do WL at $0.00 upfront costs FantasyXXX.AI Teams: jean.francois.laverdiere TG: @jman1216

07-23-2013, 07:39 AM	#13
rhon23 Rebel Girl Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: The Island Of Misfit Toys Posts: 3,264	I love the series. Woodrocket has a lot of good stuff on there.

07-23-2013, 07:42 AM	#14
privatesociety Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 567	Mariah Milano does this also __________________ CURRENTLY CONVERTING AT 1:55, TRY US! We film real people doing what they do best... Your friends and neighbors having sex for all the world to see. PROMOTE PRIVATE SOCIETY AND MAKE $$$ 1:55 CONVERSION RATE ICQ: 658501707 Email: [email protected]

07-23-2013, 09:09 AM	#15
Sarah_Jayne Now with more Jayne Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 40,077	Not sure why having sex on camera would mean you don't know how to cook. I'd watch. He is pretty much the only porn guy I see everyday who doesn't make me turn away.

07-23-2013, 09:19 AM	#17
Paper_Amar Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: North Miami Beach, Fl Posts: 2,607	have seen a ton of those pornstar doing these cooking things - just to get views on youtube? WTF? __________________ My icq; 4 4 7 5 4 2 1 2 8 Amar @ paper street cash .com

07-23-2013, 09:41 AM	#20
CDSmith Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: May 2001 Location: My network is hosted at TECHIEMEDIA.net ...Wait, you meant where am I located at? Oh... okay, I'm in Winnipeg, Canada. Oops. :) Posts: 51,460	He taught me how to throw a hotdog down a hallway. Does that count? __________________ *Promote Wildmatch, ImLive, Sexier.com, and more!!* ALWAYS THE HIGHEST PAYOUTS: Big Bux/ImLive SIGNUP ON NOW!!! Put some PUSSYCA$H in your pocket. ICQ me at: 31024634

07-23-2013, 09:45 AM	#21
Sly Let's do some business! Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 31,327	A lot of that review just seems like whining. I have not seen the videos by James, but based on the descriptions above, a lot of those same exact things are done on Food Network shows all the time. __________________ Vacares - Web Hosting, Domains, O365, Security & More - Paxum and BTC Accepted Windows VPS now available Great for TSS, Nifty Stats, remote work, virtual assistants, etc. Click here for more details.

07-23-2013, 01:18 PM	#23
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	One of the very best Chef's that I know is Ana Mancini. She can cook to die for. and looks damn good doing it. __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

07-23-2013, 07:52 PM	#24
Aidoru Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2012 Posts: 655	I learned how to cook with Coolio https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2sUKmj-OJaw __________________ Gravurecash - 50% Lifetime RevShare on all signups and rebills, 5% Webmaster Referral

07-23-2013, 08:15 PM	#25
Zuzana Designs All Your Design Needs Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: [email protected] Posts: 20,849	One of biggest passions in life is to cook/bake. __________________ Website Design - Consulting - Development sarah [at] zuzanadesigns.com - See Our Work