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Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed.

 
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Old 03-09-2001, 11:11 AM   #1
blakkfrogg
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: South of sobriety
Posts: 582
Great things to say at work

How about never? Is never good for you?

I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.

I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...

I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.

I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.

I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.

Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

No, my powers can only be used for good.

You sound reasonable... Time to up the medication.

Who me? I just wander from room to room

And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be...?

Do I look like a people person?

This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.

You!... Off my planet!

Does your train of thought have a caboose?

Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

A PBS mind in an MTV world.

Allow me to introduce my selves.

Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.

Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleepyet.

Can I trade this job for what's behind door # 1?

Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.

How do I set a laser printer to stun?

I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted the paychecks.

If I throw a stick, will you leave?

Sarcasm is just one more service we offer

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Old 03-09-2001, 11:52 AM   #2
Tomahawk
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Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Mars
Posts: 57
Am I dreaming here?

------------------
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Old 03-09-2001, 08:06 PM   #3
Gemini
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Those are great blakkfrogg! Where did you find them? Quite of few are ones I'd like to pop off with but I usually don't think of them until the next day, nor do I come up with them so well put. lol
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Old 03-09-2001, 08:10 PM   #4
aprilkorova
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Location: SoCal
Posts: 649
LOL... Wasn't it you that posted something similar about a different topic? I'm going to have to search your name and read that again, that shit cracked me up too.
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Old 03-09-2001, 08:21 PM   #5
hottshot
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Location: AZ
Posts: 900
If you need me I'll call you !
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Old 03-09-2001, 08:25 PM   #6
blakkfrogg
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Location: South of sobriety
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I get things like this sent to me from friends. I don't solicit the stuff, they just know to send it.

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Old 03-11-2001, 02:52 AM   #7
Chalingo
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Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 59
I find growling at supervisors when the are angry with you is always fun... even just glaring your teeth... make it look like you are doing it without knowing... and clench your fist as well... but do it in a subtle manner.. it's fun shit... especially if your a big dude with a shaved head and everyone thinks of you as the violent crazy co-op who does not belong in college.

BTW, i no longer work there.
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Old 03-11-2001, 08:45 PM   #8
hounddog
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Posts: 25
My favorite is "Blow Me", but there's always the ever popular "GO FUCK YOURSELF".
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Old 03-11-2001, 08:52 PM   #9
tony311
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this topic makes me think of that movie "Office Space" i think thats the name of the movie. anyone else know what movie i am talkin about? the one where that nred guy sets his work place on fire LOL
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Old 03-11-2001, 09:03 PM   #10
ace0r
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office space is one of my alltime favorite dvd's! that movie is fucking hilarious.
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Old 03-11-2001, 09:11 PM   #11
blakkfrogg
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Location: South of sobriety
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You got the movie title correct... and that nerdy littlr guy with the stapler fetish was named Milton , we believe.

Great movie. I watch it from time-to-time to remind me that my life could be worse. Not all that MUCH worse, but worse none-the-less.

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Old 03-11-2001, 09:58 PM   #12
tony311
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HAHAHAHAHAHA...yea, Milton is his name, i forgot...

one of my favorite parts in that movie is this line...

"I'm gonna show her my 'OH' face.....OH! OH! OH!"

LOL
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Old 03-12-2001, 05:31 PM   #13
blackajacka
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Location: Hudson, NH USA
Posts: 15
Those are great! It's amazing, email is such a powerful tool yet stuff like that is the most common type of material sent. (and of course porn!)
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Old 03-12-2001, 05:37 PM   #14
misterwalrus
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Gotta love em all
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