![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
||||
Welcome to the GoFuckYourself.com - Adult Webmaster Forum forums. You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today! If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us. |
![]() ![]() |
|
Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed. |
|
Thread Tools |
![]() |
#1 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2005
Location: behind you
Posts: 7,402
|
what to do while on the elevator...
Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!" Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly. Sell Girl Scout cookies. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator. Shave. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?" Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!" Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. One word: Flatulence! On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom. Do Tai Chi exercises. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!" When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, motion sickness!" Give religious tracts to each passenger. Meow occassionally. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!" Leave a box between the doors. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it. Start a sing-along. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?" Play the harmonica. Shadow box. Say "Ding!" at each floor. Lean against the button panel. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space." Bring a chair along. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?" Blow spit bubbles. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body." Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger." If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!" ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
#2 |
jellyfish
![]() ![]() Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 71,528
|
![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
#3 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 17,743
|
lol.. fuckin schizo!!!.. funny shit
__________________
![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
#4 |
Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Aug 2002
Posts: 9,752
|
Nice one
![]() |
![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
#5 |
Affiliate
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 28,735
|
lame
![]()
__________________
M&A Queen |
![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
#6 |
Adult Locals
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: West Coast
Posts: 25,450
|
![]() |
![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
#7 |
Marketing & Strategy
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Former nomad
Posts: 14,293
|
Old, but still funny.
![]()
__________________
Whitehat is for chumps If you don't do it, somebody else will - true story!
|
![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
#8 |
Registered User
Industry Role:
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 54
|
not bad!
|
![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |