A great way to look at the recent bill proposed for illegals in the US. (HILARIOUS) - GoFuckYourself.com

sperbonzo · 08-25-2006, 02:12 PM

Here's one we might ALL want to write.... LOL

Dear Senator Sarbanes,

As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Immigration and Naturalization Service in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

My reasons for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stem from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill 's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, what I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years.

I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out. Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of the last five years taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent return for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005 and I estimated a gross savings approximating $72,000. After the fine this would yield me a net savings of $70,000.

In addition, I would reap the other benefits of being an illegal alien such as free health care, avoidance of paying Social Security taxes, buying automobile insurance, serving on jury panels, etc.

If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative.

Thank you for your assistance.

Your Loyal Constituent,

*********

NICE!

pr0 · 08-25-2006, 02:15 PM

probably the funniest thing i've read all week....good find!

Penthouse Tony · 08-25-2006, 02:21 PM

customer of the IRS

Loryn · 08-25-2006, 02:26 PM

That is fucking classic I love it!

Mr. Romance · 08-25-2006, 02:31 PM

great find

Mr. Romance

sperbonzo · 08-25-2006, 05:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Romance

great find

Mr. Romance

Thank you! Thank you! One and all!

*Takes a bow*

Doctor Dre · 08-25-2006, 05:19 PM

Great one... but theses priviledges were there before the bill got passed no ?

escorpio · 08-25-2006, 05:48 PM

Fucking lame.

minusonebit · 08-25-2006, 06:10 PM

Good job. Now who actually has printed this and SENT it to thier senator.

08-25-2006, 02:12 PM	#1
sperbonzo I'd rather be on my boat. Industry Role: Join Date: May 2003 Location: Miami, FL Posts: 9,748	A great way to look at the recent bill proposed for illegals in the US. (HILARIOUS) Here's one we might ALL want to write.... LOL Dear Senator Sarbanes, As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Immigration and Naturalization Service in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you. My reasons for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stem from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill 's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, what I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out. Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of the last five years taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent return for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005 and I estimated a gross savings approximating $72,000. After the fine this would yield me a net savings of $70,000. In addition, I would reap the other benefits of being an illegal alien such as free health care, avoidance of paying Social Security taxes, buying automobile insurance, serving on jury panels, etc. If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance. Your Loyal Constituent, ********* NICE! __________________ Michael Sperber / Acella Financial LLC/ Online Payment Processing [email protected] / http://Acellafinancial.com/ ICQ 177961090 / Tel +1 909 NET BILL / Skype msperber

08-25-2006, 02:15 PM	#2
pr0 rockin tha trailerpark Industry Role: Join Date: May 2001 Location: ~Coastal~ Posts: 23,088	probably the funniest thing i've read all week....good find! __________________ __________ Loadedca$h - get sum! - Revengebucks - mmm rebills! - webair (gotz sErVrz)

08-25-2006, 02:21 PM	#3
Penthouse Tony Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Mountain View, CA Posts: 5,835	customer of the IRS __________________ aamos AT FFN dot com Penthouse.com Business Development ICQ: 49090846 \| Yahoo IM: ff_aamos

08-25-2006, 02:26 PM	#4
Loryn Super Connector Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 12,853	That is fucking classic I love it! __________________ ~ loryn@loryntaylor . com ~ RIP TD

08-25-2006, 02:31 PM	#5
Mr. Romance The Face of Romance and the Symbol of Freedom Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: The America's Posts: 7,821	great find Mr. Romance __________________ Free Leads Program now paying up to $6 Gerard-Director of Global Sales Sign up Here: CamStarCash Check out: FreeCamStars ICQ: 330 662 299 gerard at freecamstars . com

08-25-2006, 05:48 PM	#8
escorpio I love to racism, bro! Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: USA! USA! USA! Posts: 23,110	Fucking lame. __________________ Unvaxxed, still alive.

08-25-2006, 06:10 PM	#9
minusonebit So Fucking Banned Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: [email protected] Posts: 7,391	Good job. Now who actually has printed this and SENT it to thier senator.