Im Fucking Pissed Jail Sucks Donkey Piss

[Va2k]

oh man what a fucked up day mates, and matettes spent the last 4 hours in city lock up I was going to my moms for dinner, I blow a stop sign DIDNT EVEN SEE the bastard. So i get pulled over COP: How are you doing tonight sir, ME: Was doing ok till you pulled me over, Cop you know you did not stop for the stop sign sir, ME: NO WHAT FREAKING SIGN?

COP: Licens and registration! ME: Sir Don't get scared but I have a problem. COP: What is it? ME: I have a bb gun in my glove compartment: COP puts his hand on his gun says pull it out slowly: ME: ALmost fucking faints

COP returns to his car: ME Almost in TEARS
COP: Sir we have a problem.
ME: OH NO WHAT IS WRONG OFFICER
COP: YOu have a suspended liciens for one you falsified your liciens plate #2 You had a conceld weapon without a permit #3 Can you step out side of the car sir,
ME: heart patters @#$*@#Y%$&(*@#Y
COP: Sir place your hands on top of the car do you have anything that will stick me blah blah blah

Me: No sir am I being arrested
COP: YEs sir
ME: What about my kids sir?
Cop: you have anyone that can come and pick them up
ME: YEs sir
What a fucking night 6 fucking tickets 4 hours in booking IM looking at about $5000 grand worth of shit

YEs I knew I wasnt allowed to drive NO WORRIES ON MY part I would accpet the ticket
Yes I knew I was screwed cause of the plates just another ticket

NO I FUCKING DID NOT know I wasnt allowed to hid a broken bb gun in my car IT Was locked up and everything

What abunch of fucking shit. NOW I have to goto court monday and ask for a lawyer


SO when things started to look up for me it SUNK fasters then the flab of a fat womens ass! God I hope tomswhores.com really does as I hope it will....

ok feel better I vented back to the BACK LOG of work I just got

PEACE

TOM BTW I will need more people that are looking for banners and tgp galleries [email protected]

OH ONLY a few more hours till I start kicking some ass on the designer contest. I will win SOMETHING LMAO

[nocostporn]

lol damn dude sorry...good thing you arent black,he would have shot you

[kenny]

some of these VA commonwealth pigs need a hole in their head.
My dad was taken down by gun point in his own yard in front of his lil children by some rookie pig, he was target shooting and there was reports of automatic gun fire.
Anyway he bought a lawyer and sued the police department and won.

[Fat Dave]

Believe it or not I went through a search once with a gun in my mouth lol. Why u would tell them about a bb gun is beyond me

[Va2k]

I told him cause the bb gun was in my glove compartment locked up with my regerstartion

[Va2k]

Originally posted by kenny
some of these VA commonwealth pigs need a hole in their head.
My dad was taken down by gun point in his own yard in front of his lil children by some rookie pig, he was target shooting and there was reports of automatic gun fire.
Anyway he bought a lawyer and sued the police department and won.

man that sucks I wish i wasnt in the wrong lol my poor kids cried so when i got home i bought them some candy and played a littel and explained to my oldest i was in the wrong and this is what happens when you break the law! I wanted to say them fucking assholes blah blah blah lol but he too young fer that lol

[TheFLY]

Yeah same shit happened to me once -- I was just goofing off one night -- drunk off my ass... minding my own business... then two cops show up out of nowhere -- they scared the piss out of me -- I should have just blown them off like it's none of their biz what I'm doing but anyway they go to search me and I forget I have this wierd looking scribe in my pocket -- of course when I open my jacket and they see that shit they freak out and they think they've caught a big fish -- I just knew the went home to their friends and exaggerated about the guy we caught w/ the huge pig-sticker in his pocket -- I mean these cops were bragging about how the caught me ALL NIGHT!! Literally they exaggerated how big my "weapon" was -- you would think I had like a fucking sword in my pocket or something hehe...

Rule #1 is never assume that cops won't fuck with you
Rule #2 know exactly what you are going to say about who you are, what you are doing, where you are going, and why you are doing it... It's always best to come up w/ a "normal" reason for doing things -- don't say "well I'm off to enjoy the night air and go exploring" -- no the correct answer is "thanks for being considerate of my safety -- I was going to the ATM machine down the block" -- see then you are no longer a criminal but a person that needs to be protected from crime ;)

[Dawgy]

if i give you a $1000 will you go back to jail for a 2 hour photoshoot with some of your new friends?

[Rochard]

Originally posted by nocostporn
lol damn dude sorry...good thing you arent black,he would have shot you

That's fucking funny.....

[TheFLY]

Originally posted by va2k

man that sucks I wish i wasnt in the wrong lol my poor kids cried so when i got home i bought them some candy and played a littel and explained to my oldest i was in the wrong and this is what happens when you break the law! I wanted to say them fucking assholes blah blah blah lol but he too young fer that lol

LOL that sucks... maybe don't assume they are too young... tell your kid what you are posting here... just say

"sometimes people get angry about things -- and to feel better and relax, they need to bitch and moan and make loud noises"

I think any kid would understand that -- everyone needs to blow off steam once and a while... even kids. I remember tearing up my room and feeling guilty about it as a kid -- my parents were furious -- they should have just recognized that I was fucking frustrated about some shit and needed to blow off some steam \

-- I think every kid should have a real full sized punching bag in his or her room -- that would save a lot of repairs on the house too -- I know I broke a lot of shit!

[volante]

A guy get's pulled over by the police for speeding. Normal conversation ensues, until the cop asks what the guy does for a living.

"I design and build rectal stretching machines" says the guy.
"Rectal stretching machines? What are they used for?" asks the cop.
"Well," replies the guy, "you insert the machine into the rectum you wish to stretch, turn it on, and wait. Eventually the rectum will be stretched by about 6 feet."
"Six feet? What would you do with a six foot rectum?" asks the cop.
"Give it a badge and a radar gun, and stand it beside a busy road" replies the guy.

Gotta say Va2k, that sucks big time! The last time I got stopped was for speeding - I was doing 80mph in a sixty zone when a car came up behind me and sat on my bumper with it's headlights on full beam, so I accelerated to 100mph. The car behind couldn't keep up around the bends (I knew the road VERY well, there was no other traffic around and it was at 3am I hasten to add!) and once I had put a bit of distance between us, I slowed back down to 80mph. The other driver caught up again, and started flashing his lights at me. I was just about to accelerate away when he turned his blue lights on as well...

I was not in the best of moods. I was asked if I knew what speed I was doing, and I said "no, I was watching the road not the speedometer". He said he clocked me at 80mph (I just managed to stop myself from "is that all?") and he asked why I was going so fast, so I said "'cos you were tailgating! I wanted to put some room between us so you didn't crash into me!".

Get this - he apologised to me and let me off with a warning! Just a "keep you eye on your speed in the future" and that was it

Perhaps the English police aren't that bad after all...

[Va2k]

Originally posted by Dawgy
if i give you a $1000 will you go back to jail for a 2 hour photoshoot with some of your new friends?

hahaha at this point IM almost willing to do anything for a gand lmao theFLY damn dewd shit I dont know what it is when the MAN confronts me and EVEN IF I HAVENT done nothing wrong IM LIKE tripping on my words cant really think etc.... it sucks

[TheFLY]

Originally posted by RocHard


That's fucking funny.....

not really too funny -- there was an innocent kid here in my town (Florida) shot by a cop... and I don't think he was black either... if you don't look like a frat boy and the cops get scared -- you're dodging bullets like in the Matrix...

[Va2k]

Originally posted by volante
A guy get's pulled over by the police for speeding. Normal conversation ensues, until the cop asks what the guy does for a living.

"I design and build rectal stretching machines" says the guy.
"Rectal stretching machines? What are they used for?" asks the cop.
"Well," replies the guy, "you insert the machine into the rectum you wish to stretch, turn it on, and wait. Eventually the rectum will be stretched by about 6 feet."
"Six feet? What would you do with a six foot rectum?" asks the cop.
"Give it a badge and a radar gun, and stand it beside a busy road" replies the guy.

Gotta say Va2k, that sucks big time! The last time I got stopped was for speeding - I was doing 80mph in a sixty zone when a car came up behind me and sat on my bumper with it's headlights on full beam, so I accelerated to 100mph. The car behind couldn't keep up around the bends (I knew the road VERY well, there was no other traffic around and it was at 3am I hasten to add!) and once I had put a bit of distance between us, I slowed back down to 80mph. The other driver caught up again, and started flashing his lights at me. I was just about to accelerate away when he turned his blue lights on as well...

I was not in the best of moods. I was asked if I knew what speed I was doing, and I said "no, I was watching the road not the speedometer". He said he clocked me at 80mph (I just managed to stop myself from "is that all?") and he asked why I was going so fast, so I said "'cos you were tailgating! I wanted to put some room between us so you didn't crash into me!".

Get this - he apologised to me and let me off with a warning! Just a "keep you eye on your speed in the future" and that was it

Perhaps the English police aren't that bad after all...

MAN OLE MAN that joke made my night mate Thanks for that one NOW I am feeling alot better my head is calming down and you were lucky lol

[kenny]

There are some good cops, but 90% are power trippin and aren't worth a fuck. I think most cops got picked on in high school or something and are out for revenge.

Pete, I would replace your first rule with:

1. Always assume every cop is out to fuck you.

[corvette]

sorry to hear about that


these things happen every year or two

gotta do what you gotta do, bro

it will be OK in the end

[Va2k]

Originally posted by TheFLY


LOL that sucks... maybe don't assume they are too young... tell your kid what you are posting here... just say

"sometimes people get angry about things -- and to feel better and relax, they need to bitch and moan and make loud noises"

I think any kid would understand that -- everyone needs to blow off steam once and a while... even kids. I remember tearing up my room and feeling guilty about it as a kid -- my parents were furious -- they should have just recognized that I was fucking frustrated about some shit and needed to blow off some steam \

-- I think every kid should have a real full sized punching bag in his or her room -- that would save a lot of repairs on the house too -- I know I broke a lot of shit!

yea lol but my kids are 6 and 2 lol I really try not to go off the handle around them and curse hell my little one said fucker and I felt like shit but he really wasnt saying fucker he was saying frogger as in frogger the video game lol

[TheFLY]

Originally posted by evildick
Pete, I would replace your first rule with:

1. Always assume every cop is out to fuck you.

that's a little too pessimistic for me...

i got to at least look on the bright side of life sometimes ;)

[Va2k]

I hear that well god I want to stay and keep checking the board but if I do this I wont get started again and then go to bed YAWNS but need to do alot of work long nite ahead of me. IF you need to chat though anyone you can reach me on icq

PEACE need to reboot ;(

[TheFLY]

Originally posted by va2k
felt like shit but he really wasnt saying fucker he was saying frogger as in frogger the video game lol

Teach him, "YOU MODDER FROGGER!"

[redshift]

sorry to hear that man hope everything works out

bb gun??? thats nuthin but a fuckin toy

Folks down here carry a small arsenal in their car with no problem.
we dont have any car jacking problems either. the last two guys I heard about trying to car jack someone got shot dead.

[pr0]

Originally posted by kenny
some of these VA commonwealth pigs need a hole in their head.
My dad was taken down by gun point in his own yard in front of his lil children by some rookie pig, he was target shooting and there was reports of automatic gun fire.
Anyway he bought a lawyer and sued the police department and won.

i've never had a single problem with a virginia police officer, always polite & well spoken/nice.

[SilverSiR]

Driving with a suspended license is one of the dumbest things you can do. Last time I went to go pay my court fines I ask the lady what was the biggest fine she's seen, her answer $50,000! No way I would take the risk in driving with a suspended license. And also why would you have a BB gun in your car? Obviously he probably thought you were some hoodlum carrying it for protection so you can use for your road rage.

The cop totally had a justified reason to bring you to jail,
1. Driving with a suspended license (which now will make your suspension longer)
2. Carrying a BB gun in your car, why a person would carry it in their glove compartment is beyond me.
3. Failure to stop, which is a major offence actually.

Just think about it in the cops perspective, you'll see the light, I would definantly not call this guy power-hungry.

Trust me, I know what power-hungry cops are, 19 year old Asian male, driving a souped up import car. If I look at a cop wrong they'll pull me over, ive been pulled over like 10-12 times already in 3 years. Some cops are cool, like the over 40 year olds who have long gone pass the power-hungry phase, but if you get a young cop, good luck. Even worst than that a young female cop, those are absolutely the worst ones, they have no sympathy for you, their sole reason to enter the police force is to get that badge so they can make up for lacking a penis.

Oh yeah, if I were you I would definantly hire a lawyer for your court date, you're going to need one. He'll plea bargain with the state and hopefully he'll do a good job and you'll get away with less of a fine and no jail time.

[baddog]

Originally posted by Dawgy
if i give you a $1000 will you go back to jail for a 2 hour photoshoot with some of your new friends?

[kenny]

Originally posted by pr0


i've never had a single problem with a virginia police officer, always polite & well spoken/nice.

I said some VA policemen, ones that I know.

[Corona]

Originally posted by TheFLY


not really too funny -- there was an innocent kid here in my town (Florida) shot by a cop... and I don't think he was black either... if you don't look like a frat boy and the cops get scared -- you're dodging bullets like in the Matrix...

Or how about Amadou Diallo in NY.

4 cops shot at him 41 times "only" hitting him 19 times.

His only crime - being black.

The four officers were acquitted of all criminal charges

[nocostporn]

Originally posted by Corona


Or how about Amadou Diallo in NY.

4 cops shot at him 41 times "only" hitting him 19 times.

His only crime - being black.

The four officers were acquitted of all criminal charges

no they werent acquitted at first...this is the fucked up thing,they sent them to jail for 3 months to avoid riots and so forth,and they let them out on the sly,nobody really picked it up (news wise)...sad sad things that the country gets away with

[kenny]

There was a local case here. A guy got pulled over and jumped out of his car prematurely. Was shot and killed by a cop.
I personally know someone in prision for hitting a cop dog with a hammer, the cops turned a dog loose on him so he grabbed a hammer and hit the dog in defense. Felony Offense

[baddog]

Originally posted by nocostporn




no they werent acquitted at first...

Do you know anything that you are talking about? First you think the Kings are worth anything, and then you come off with this line.
The cops were all acquitted.

[Pathfinder]

va2k:

COP: YOu have a suspended liciens for one you falsified your liciens plate #2 You had a conceld weapon without a permit #3 Can you step out side of the car sir,

Is having a concealed BB gun, really considered to be a concealed "weapon" in Virginia? I put "weapon" in quotes because I certainly do not view a BB gun as a weapon.

I live in California and hell; it may be considered as a concealed "weapon" here. Maybe some of you California guys/gals can clue me in on current law.

Many years ago (about twenty-five), in the state of California, I was riding with a friend and he was pulled over for speeding. There were two officers in the patrol car. One approached the driver's side and the other approached the passenger side. When my friend was asked for his registration he told me to take it out of the glove compartment. When I opened the glove compartment the officer on my side of the car spotted a pistol pouch, reached through the open window and removed the pistol pouch.

My friend had a .25 semi auto in the pouch and it was loaded. The pistol was registered, but he did not have a permit for concealment. He was given a citation for speeding and possesion of a concealed weapon and the officers retained possesion of the pistol.

When he went to court he was fined for speeding and fined $25.00 for possesion of a concealed weapon.

I am sure with changes in the law a concealed weapons violation in this state is more serious than a $25.00 fine. Maybe some of you California guys/gals can clue me in on current law.

One amusing aside; My friend was asked by the judge why the pistol was loaded? He answered; "Well your honor. I may as well have a piece of scrap iron if it wasn't loaded."

[Milton]

dangerouse stuff police .. look at discovery channel

[mule]

Aw shit, Tom
Good luck monday, dude!

Hell, where I live, we have to register our BB guns with the government if their velocity is over a certain feet per second.

Can you imagine what it's like to get a real handgun here?

[mjrools23]

hahaha oh shit that sucks

[TheFLY]

Originally posted by Pathfinder
Is having a concealed BB gun, really considered to be a concealed "weapon" in Virginia? I put "weapon" in quotes because I certainly do not view a BB gun as a weapon.

Believe it or not -- in Florida -- what is considered a weapon is purely up to the officer... I did a lot of searching into the books and really there's no specific definition in Florida of what is considered a weapon. Anyone that thinks that the law is anything under 4" is legal -- you're wrong -- it's totally up to the cop to decide if the weapon is dangerous -- at least here in Florida.

Now I don't even carry my favorite keychain that a girlfriend made for me because it looks like it could be a weapon -- every time I get pulled over -- cops look at my keychain and give me shit about it. Because it was forged by hand these moron cops have to be retards about a fucking keychain. I feel like I should join the NRA...

[TheFLY]

Originally posted by SilverSiR
Even worst than that a young female cop, those are absolutely the worst ones, they have no sympathy for you, their sole reason to enter the police force is to get that badge so they can make up for lacking a penis.

That's pretty funny... I think the other half of it is that they feel like they have to prove themselves to the other cops that they are "man" enough for the job...

Anyway I wouldn't get a lawyer -- waste of time... When you you get to speak to the judge he will ask you if you want a trial or not -- if the judge seems like he's in a bad mood then you want a trial -- but if he seems like a reasonable guy then just let the judge decide the sentence and that's it your done -- judges hate unnecessary trials so you are better off to avoid the trial.

[Rip]

I got pulled over by a female cop for "running a red light" once, downtown on a Friday night

my buddy goes "... you didn't run a red light!"

I say "...yeah I know.." and end up going to court, where after waiting 1 hour she "offers no evidence" to the judge

turns out she was a cougar on the prowl - me and my buddy coulda had a good time and we didn't even know it - doh!

[RockDaddy]

Definately get a lawyer. Even if you don't plan on going to trial, I'm sure you would want an experienced attorney plea bargaining for you. AND you never know.. there is always the chance he could get the thing dismissed on some technicality. It does happen from time to time.


RD

[Pipecrew]

Originally posted by kenny
There was a local case here. A guy got pulled over and jumped out of his car prematurely. Was shot and killed by a cop.
I personally know someone in prision for hitting a cop dog with a hammer, the cops turned a dog loose on him so he grabbed a hammer and hit the dog in defense. Felony Offense

Thats the same as hitting a cop with a hammer, they declare all those police dogs cops so if you shoot em, your doing life

[Pathfinder]

Anyone up to date with current California law?

[baddog]

Originally posted by Pathfinder
Anyone up to date with current California law?

whatcha need to know?

[volante]

Originally posted by Pathfinder
Anyone up to date with current California law?

Watcha done wrong?

[Sugarpuss]

There is something to be said for Aussie coppers......thank god they arent like some americans

[foe]

That sucks dude, hopefully everything goes well, good luck

[Pathfinder]

baddog and volante:

Read my post?

[Domain Distribution]

What the fuck? ? ? ? ? ? ?

[AaronM]

Originally Posted by Domain Distribution

What the fuck? ? ? ? ? ? ?

WTF is right.

As in WTF are you doing bumping 5 year old threads?

[Antonio]

next time they pull you over tell them about your secret ganja stash too

[CDSmith]

Christ, what idiot dug up this relic.

Ah, post 47. Idiot. Carry on...