The Hit Man .... - GoFuckYourself.com

CuriousToyBoy · 08-30-2007, 08:13 PM

Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up."

"Sure," they said, "You're welcome." So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer.

Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a hit man for the mob," was the reply.

"You're joking!" was the response.

"No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here are my tools."

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend, "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here." So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of his house.

"Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window." "Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha Ha, I can see she's naked!! And look at that, my asshole neighbour is knocking on my front door !!".

He turned to the hitman, "How much do you charge for a hit?"

"I'll do you a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the trigger."

"Can you do two for me now?"

"Sure, what do you want?"

"First, shoot my wife, she's always been a mouthy bitch, so shoot her in the mouth."

"Then the neighbor, he's a pain in the ass and no friend of mine, so just shoot his dick off to teach him a lesson."

The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes.

"Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.

"Just be patient," said the hitman calmly, "Give them a minute or 2 and I think I can save you a grand here.....

AlienQ - BANNED FOR LIFE · 08-30-2007, 08:14 PM

awesome

SPACE GLIDER · 08-30-2007, 08:16 PM

Okay, that was a good one

Aussie Rebel · 08-30-2007, 08:17 PM

tony286 · 08-30-2007, 08:17 PM

very funny, good one.

dodger21 · 08-30-2007, 08:51 PM

Too much to read, someone summarize it

marketsmart · 08-30-2007, 09:23 PM

ok, so let me get this right... the guy was going to save $1000 because his neighbor was actually a chick... ah... ok... i got it...

Zuzana Designs · 08-30-2007, 09:26 PM

lolz

...........

wyldworx · 08-30-2007, 09:32 PM

awkwardly snickered whilst squeezing out a harmonic rectal accompaniment. 2 roars for you.

de-ranged · 08-30-2007, 09:41 PM

I thought he was going to save him a grand because she was about to give head and so he could blow the dick off and shoot her in that face at the same time...what did i miss?

CuriousToyBoy · 08-30-2007, 09:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dodger21

Too much to read, someone summarize it

You had your dick shot off.

CuriousToyBoy · 08-30-2007, 09:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by de-ranged

I thought he was going to save him a grand because she was about to give head and so he could blow the dick off and shoot her in that face at the same time...what did i miss?

Apparently nothing.

08-30-2007, 08:13 PM	#1
CuriousToyBoy Crazy Aussie Bastard Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Wherever I lay my hat, that's my home. Posts: 16,787	The Hit Man .... Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up." "Sure," they said, "You're welcome." So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer. Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?" "I'm a hit man for the mob," was the reply. "You're joking!" was the response. "No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here are my tools." "That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend, "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here." So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of his house. "Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window." "Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha Ha, I can see she's naked!! And look at that, my asshole neighbour is knocking on my front door !!". He turned to the hitman, "How much do you charge for a hit?" "I'll do you a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the trigger." "Can you do two for me now?" "Sure, what do you want?" "First, shoot my wife, she's always been a mouthy bitch, so shoot her in the mouth." "Then the neighbor, he's a pain in the ass and no friend of mine, so just shoot his dick off to teach him a lesson." The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes. "Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently. "Just be patient," said the hitman calmly, "Give them a minute or 2 and I think I can save you a grand here..... __________________ Celebs Adult Who's Who ==> Ambush Interview ==> ICQ 293 070 684 ==> intmarpacrim AT gmail DOT com

08-30-2007, 08:14 PM	#2
AlienQ - BANNED FOR LIFE best designer on GFY Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: IALIEN.COM - High Definition Video and Photographic Productions -ICQ 78943384 Posts: 30,307	awesome __________________ NAKED HOSTING FTW!11 I'm On The INSANE PLAN $9.95/mo! \| The Alien Blog Adult News Worth Reading Updated Daily \| Content For Sale! 641 PICS 216 MINUTES OF VIDEO $350.00 \|ICQ: 78943384 \|

08-30-2007, 08:16 PM	#3
SPACE GLIDER Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 1,550	Okay, that was a good one __________________ EarnCoin - Revive Your Ratios Now! Pain Lessons \|Orgastic Shock \| Snatch Sizers

08-30-2007, 08:51 PM	#6
dodger21 Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 2,680	Too much to read, someone summarize it __________________ icq: 237055440

08-30-2007, 09:26 PM	#8
Zuzana Designs All Your Design Needs Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: [email protected] Posts: 20,826	lolz ........... __________________ Website Design - Consulting - Development sarah [at] zuzanadesigns.com - See Our Work

08-30-2007, 08:17 PM	#4
Aussie Rebel Blow Me U Geeks Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Maximum Security Posts: 5,108

08-30-2007, 08:17 PM	#5
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	very funny, good one.

08-30-2007, 09:23 PM	#7
marketsmart HOMICIDAL TROLL KILLER Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Sunnybrook Institution for the Criminally Insane Posts: 20,419	ok, so let me get this right... the guy was going to save $1000 because his neighbor was actually a chick... ah... ok... i got it...

08-30-2007, 09:32 PM	#9
wyldworx So Fucking Banned Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: oz-trailer Posts: 5,144	awkwardly snickered whilst squeezing out a harmonic rectal accompaniment. 2 roars for you.

08-30-2007, 09:41 PM	#10
de-ranged Registered User Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 33	I thought he was going to save him a grand because she was about to give head and so he could blow the dick off and shoot her in that face at the same time...what did i miss? __________________ De-Ranged ---------- Coming to fuck up your world