The Day the Penis asked for a Raise - GoFuckYourself.com

TTiger · 09-02-2008, 11:17 PM

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labor.I work at great depths. I plunge headfirst into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Sincerely,
P. Niss

The Response

Dear Penis:
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight. You fall asleep after brief work periods. You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the Correct protective clothing. You will retire well before you are 65. You are unable to work double shifts. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
Sincerely,
V.Gina

Jon Clark - BANNED FOR LIFE · 09-02-2008, 11:22 PM

lmao....

WWC · 09-03-2008, 12:24 AM

oh thats awesome! good one

ExLust · 09-03-2008, 01:02 AM

I've read this before. Still a good one. lol

Manowar · 09-03-2008, 02:42 AM

hahaha, that's awesome!

SexualDragon · 09-03-2008, 03:01 AM

still good after all this time

bbm · 09-03-2008, 03:35 AM

Funny story, author has problem with his penis

tiptop · 09-03-2008, 03:51 AM

The best of the week!

Neon Dollars Daniel · 09-03-2008, 03:58 AM

Nice one, I chuckled!

bobby666 · 09-03-2008, 04:21 AM

hehe, funny

gimo33 · 09-03-2008, 04:29 AM

lol... nice one

Spunky · 09-03-2008, 06:25 AM

Heh heh.the dick gets no repect

tranza · 09-03-2008, 08:34 AM

One of the best I've hard in years!!!

RevengeBucks_Monica · 09-03-2008, 08:36 AM

HAHAHA oh man, the very last line made me laugh out loud and scare my dog.

Martin · 09-03-2008, 08:36 AM

hahahaa shiiit....

Pete-KT · 09-03-2008, 08:45 AM

Now thats a good one

anc13 · 09-03-2008, 09:25 AM

cooool!!!

firecracker · 09-03-2008, 10:02 AM

I love these kinds of dirty jokes. Very creative and made me laugh...

jmk · 09-03-2008, 10:06 AM

Oldie but Goldie

kelly kola · 09-03-2008, 10:07 AM

So awesome.... I love it!

woj · 09-03-2008, 10:11 AM

old, but still good

tiger · 09-03-2008, 10:21 AM

That's great, hadn't see it before.

09-02-2008, 11:17 PM	#1
TTiger Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: quebec, canada Posts: 3,030	The Day the Penis asked for a Raise I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: I do physical labor.I work at great depths. I plunge headfirst into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Sincerely, P. Niss The Response Dear Penis: After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons: You do not work 8 hours straight. You fall asleep after brief work periods. You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the Correct protective clothing. You will retire well before you are 65. You are unable to work double shifts. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags. Sincerely, V.Gina __________________

09-03-2008, 12:24 AM	#3
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09-03-2008, 03:01 AM	#6
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09-03-2008, 03:58 AM	#9
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09-02-2008, 11:22 PM	#2
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09-03-2008, 01:02 AM	#4
ExLust Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 3,223	I've read this before. Still a good one. lol

09-03-2008, 02:42 AM	#5
Manowar jellyfish Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 71,528	hahaha, that's awesome!

09-03-2008, 03:35 AM	#7
bbm So Fucking Banned Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 3,710	Funny story, author has problem with his penis

09-03-2008, 04:21 AM	#10
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09-03-2008, 04:29 AM	#11
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09-03-2008, 06:25 AM	#12
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09-03-2008, 08:34 AM	#13
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09-03-2008, 08:36 AM	#14
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09-03-2008, 08:36 AM	#15
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09-03-2008, 08:45 AM	#16
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09-03-2008, 09:25 AM	#17
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09-03-2008, 10:02 AM	#18
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09-03-2008, 10:06 AM	#19
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09-03-2008, 10:07 AM	#20
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09-03-2008, 10:11 AM	#21
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09-03-2008, 10:21 AM	#22
tiger Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 6,986	That's great, hadn't see it before. __________________