Goldman Sachs SHORTED The Gulf of Mexico One Day before Gulf Disaster - GoFuckYourself.com

onwebcam · 05-31-2010, 11:11 AM

Andy Borowitz

BorowitzReport.com
Posted: April 30, 2010 01:25 PM

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) - In what is looming as another public relations predicament for Goldman Sachs, the banking giant admitted today that it made "a substantial financial bet against the Gulf of Mexico" one day before the sinking of an oil rig in that body of water.

The new revelations came to light after government investigators turned up new emails from Goldman employee Fabrice "Fabulous Fab" Tourre in which he bragged to a girlfriend that the firm was taking a "big short" position on the Gulf.

"One oil rig goes down and we're going to be rolling in dough," Mr. Tourre wrote in one email. "Suck it, fishies and birdies!"

The news about Goldman's bet against the Gulf comes on the heels of embarrassing revelations that the firm had taken a short position on Lindsay Lohan's acting career.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/andy-b..._b_558774.html

Amputate Your Head · 05-31-2010, 11:13 AM

Goldman's execs all need to be wasting away in a Russian gulag.

onwebcam · 05-31-2010, 11:14 AM

Ok so apparently this was a spoof.. Man that got my blood pumping..

cykoe6 · 05-31-2010, 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by onwebcam

Ok so apparently this was a spoof.. Man that got my blood pumping..

Everything you have ever posted was a spoof...... you are just blissfully unaware of that.

onwebcam · 05-31-2010, 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cykoe6

Everything you have ever posted was a spoof...... you are just blissfully unaware of that.

Everything eh? You're so full of shit it's not even funny. The only time you jump into one of my discussions is when you think you have a "cheap shot" these days..

notime · 05-31-2010, 11:30 AM

Going "short" on the "position on the Gulf region", is that even possible?
Sounds a bit far fetched if you ask me.

onwebcam · 05-31-2010, 11:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by notime

Going "short" on the "position on the Gulf region", is that even possible?
Sounds a bit far fetched is you ask me.

Wouldn't at all surrprise me.. They have bets going on on everything..

Trax · 05-31-2010, 11:33 AM

too many morons in this thread...

cykoe6 · 05-31-2010, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by onwebcam

Everything eh? You're so full of shit it's not even funny. The only time you jump into one of my discussions is when you think you have a "cheap shot" these days..

I apologize if I am unable to take your lunacy seriously enough to engage you in an in depth manner....... anyway I though mayabong had taken over as the Stormfront rep on GFY....... why are you still here?

mayabong · 05-31-2010, 12:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cykoe6

I apologize if I am unable to take your lunacy seriously enough to engage you in an in depth manner....... anyway I though mayabong had taken over as the Stormfront rep on GFY....... why are you still here?

Stormfront? I dont even know what that is.

The Duck · 05-31-2010, 12:51 PM

What kind of bet is that anyway, fake.

onwebcam · 05-31-2010, 01:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mayabong

Stormfront? I dont even know what that is.

Me neither..

I guess it's some sort of site he hangs out at..

woj · 05-31-2010, 01:10 PM

sounded fake from a mile away...

tiger · 05-31-2010, 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by notime

Going "short" on the "position on the Gulf region", is that even possible?
Sounds a bit far fetched if you ask me.

Yeah I thought the same thing. It sounds like a ridiculous reporter conclusion to make the story more interesting, the usual dumbing down of the news. They probably shorted something that operates or is related to the gulf and the reporter makes it into "they shorted the gulf".

Anyone know the stock symbol for the gulf?

fuzebox · 05-31-2010, 01:52 PM

I bet this guy planted a bomb on the rig...

Adraco · 05-31-2010, 01:55 PM

Ahhh, dumb people are everywhere! How would you "short the Gulf"???
One can short assets/companies earning in/from the Gulf, but not the Gulf itself, moron.

Oh well, please keep going. It's because of idiots and dumbasses that it's still possible and quite easy to make money on financial markets. A lot of uneducated people buy assets they don't understand and believe that they are secure. And that's, how fortunes are built, by selling risk to dumb nuts.

$5 submissions · 05-31-2010, 01:59 PM

This just proves how badass Goldman's research department is. Maybe if their stock price dips, it's a good time to buy?

dyna mo · 05-31-2010, 03:54 PM

blue oyster loves anacot steel.

Coup · 05-31-2010, 03:55 PM

GULF OF MEXICO WAS AN INSIDE JOB! OBAMA LIED PEOPLE DIED!

oh boy, here we go

Coup · 05-31-2010, 03:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by onwebcam

Ok so apparently this was a spoof.. Man that got my blood pumping..

haha you're insane

DamnGoodRatio · 05-31-2010, 04:03 PM

The Lohan short I can understand LOL . . .

epitome · 05-31-2010, 04:05 PM

People are funny.

You should have clicked the tiny url at the end...

For those that didn't: http://tinyurl.com/y8ufsnp

05-31-2010, 11:11 AM	#1
onwebcam Fake Nick 1.0 Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Rent free, your head Posts: 27,653	Goldman Sachs SHORTED The Gulf of Mexico One Day before Gulf Disaster Andy Borowitz BorowitzReport.com Posted: April 30, 2010 01:25 PM NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) - In what is looming as another public relations predicament for Goldman Sachs, the banking giant admitted today that it made "a substantial financial bet against the Gulf of Mexico" one day before the sinking of an oil rig in that body of water. The new revelations came to light after government investigators turned up new emails from Goldman employee Fabrice "Fabulous Fab" Tourre in which he bragged to a girlfriend that the firm was taking a "big short" position on the Gulf. "One oil rig goes down and we're going to be rolling in dough," Mr. Tourre wrote in one email. "Suck it, fishies and birdies!" The news about Goldman's bet against the Gulf comes on the heels of embarrassing revelations that the firm had taken a short position on Lindsay Lohan's acting career. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/andy-b..._b_558774.html __________________ PLEASE WAIT WHILE BIDEN ADMIN UNINSTALLS ITSELF..... ██████████████████▒ 99.5% complete.

05-31-2010, 11:13 AM	#2
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	Goldman's execs all need to be wasting away in a Russian gulag. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

05-31-2010, 11:14 AM	#3
onwebcam Fake Nick 1.0 Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Rent free, your head Posts: 27,653	Ok so apparently this was a spoof.. Man that got my blood pumping.. __________________ PLEASE WAIT WHILE BIDEN ADMIN UNINSTALLS ITSELF..... ██████████████████▒ 99.5% complete. Last edited by onwebcam; 05-31-2010 at 11:19 AM..

05-31-2010, 11:30 AM	#6
notime Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: cyberspace Posts: 8,019	Going "short" on the "position on the Gulf region", is that even possible? Sounds a bit far fetched if you ask me. Last edited by notime; 05-31-2010 at 11:41 AM..

05-31-2010, 12:51 PM	#11
The Duck Adult Content Provider Industry Role: Join Date: May 2005 Location: Europe Posts: 18,243	What kind of bet is that anyway, fake. __________________ Skype Horusmaia ICQ 41555245 Email [email protected]

05-31-2010, 11:33 AM	#8
Trax [----------------------] Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 14,486	too many morons in this thread...

05-31-2010, 01:10 PM	#13
woj <&(©¿©)&> Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Chicago Posts: 47,882	sounded fake from a mile away... __________________ Custom Software Development, email: woj#at#wojfun#.#com to discuss details or skype: wojl2000 or gchat: wojfun or telegram: wojl2000 Affiliate program tools: Hosted Galleries Manager Banner Manager Video Manager Wordpress Affiliate Plugin Pic/Movie of the Day Fansign Generator Zip Manager

05-31-2010, 01:52 PM	#15
fuzebox making it rain Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: seattle Posts: 22,013	I bet this guy planted a bomb on the rig...

05-31-2010, 01:55 PM	#16
Adraco Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: May 2009 Location: Onboard an airplane around the globe Posts: 3,733	Ahhh, dumb people are everywhere! How would you "short the Gulf"??? One can short assets/companies earning in/from the Gulf, but not the Gulf itself, moron. Oh well, please keep going. It's because of idiots and dumbasses that it's still possible and quite easy to make money on financial markets. A lot of uneducated people buy assets they don't understand and believe that they are secure. And that's, how fortunes are built, by selling risk to dumb nuts. __________________ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The truth is not affected by the beliefs, or doubts, of the majority.

05-31-2010, 01:59 PM	#17
$5 submissions I help you SUCCEED Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The Pearl of the Orient Seas Posts: 32,195	This just proves how badass Goldman's research department is. Maybe if their stock price dips, it's a good time to buy? __________________ Need a NON-ADULT income stream? We build your YOUTUBE CHANNEL for only $20 per video! For Hire: $3/hour or $400 per month Marketing Specialist Virtual Assistants

05-31-2010, 03:54 PM	#18
dyna mo The People's Post Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: invisible 7-11 Posts: 63,914	blue oyster loves anacot steel.

05-31-2010, 03:55 PM	#19
Coup 🚨 PBBC International 🚨 Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: /👁\ Posts: 9,932	GULF OF MEXICO WAS AN INSIDE JOB! OBAMA LIED PEOPLE DIED! oh boy, here we go

05-31-2010, 04:03 PM	#21
DamnGoodRatio Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: USA Posts: 855	The Lohan short I can understand LOL . . . __________________ Obama Said: "We can absorb a terrorist attack."

05-31-2010, 04:05 PM	#22
epitome So Fucking Lame Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: St. Petersburg, FL Posts: 12,158	People are funny. You should have clicked the tiny url at the end... For those that didn't: http://tinyurl.com/y8ufsnp