Help please...
 

I was rubbing my wee wee, and it got larger !

Anyway, it felt nice, so I carried on, and - GET THIS - Some white sticky stuff (Not Wee) came out the end!!!

Its all on my hands, my desk, my keyboard, my shorts, my ferraris, etc etc... What should I do, and how do I clean it up???

Go upstairs and show your mother.

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You should stuff the leak with poo. It makes for great caulking.