My calls and wants to talk to me privately and is distressed.
 

^Mom calls

My jackass of an uncle is up in allegations that he's having an affair.

The fact is the guy is having an affair, him and his wife don't have sex anymore and he started courting his masseuse (some indian girl).
The funny thing is everyone in the family already knew because he explicitly told a few of us and my granddad has seen him with her several times.

His daughter confronted him (due to many long absences) and now he's trying to find a target to point at. My uncle starts calling everyone and trying to figure out who the hell ratted him out. My mom calls to discuss this and was worried that his daughter (my cousin) was told by me. There was no way as we never talk and she's not on my Facebook. This affair has been going on 3-4 years now. It was only a matter of time. My mother was relieved that it couldn't have been me though, so that's good.

The guy has a lot of money, millions (not sure if over 10) as he owns a very specialized machine shop on long island.
Again the guys a bit of a jackass as 3 years ago I stayed with him and he dropped me off so I could go out and party a bit, we agreed that he'd get a phone call if I found someone to hang out with... I found someone to hang out with and we went back and really hot unprotected sex! Shit was so fucking cash! ... anyway....
I called several times and got the answering machine (which supposedly worked only some of the time). I left a message for him telling the situation.

After fucking raw and having breakfast with this sugar mama from last night I get dropped off. While walking in my uncle is there talking on the phone, it was bad as he was still wearing the shirt from last night: "...oh oh don't worry, he just walked in." He preceded to turn around and start yelling at me "where the hell have you been..." blah blah etc. Poor guy had been up all night calling police and looking for me. I didn't want to make a fuss but made a point to check the answering machine... "well it only works sometimes." Sure enough there was my voice telling of the situation.

Moral of the story: STFU about your affairs, and if you have millions bother to learn technology that works and rely on it.

so you know have aids from unprotected sex

thread forwarded to your uncle.

Was she a tranny?

How does your Pedobear costume fit into all this?

.

I'm clean. I almost always use a condom. She was a little older and after scouting her lifestyle and examining her vagina (something I always do) I opted for pleasure. She really got worked over by me and apparently couldn't stopped thinking about me for the following week at work until our next date.
This was over the course of working 3 weeks with my uncle in his machine shop.

His last name is different from mine, good luck faggot.

Never fucked a tranny. I'm not sure if I'd be into chix with dicks or guys with tits.

I had not realized the power of that costume until recently, LOL. I'm actually leery of wearing it now after things like this:
http://gawker.com/5636011/stupid-cal...dophile-mascot

It's all a matter of perspective though. The fact all of you understand it makes me wonder.