Women are fucking amazing and men should never be in a kitchen unless they're fucking women in there
 

I'm awake, alone, and thought to myself.. well, I'm going to eat a huge salad and watch my favorite program.

So I'm in there and I get out this huge bowl and find some cheese.. I manage to get it unwrapped and realize that I have no idea of how to find a cheese grater. Ten minutes and some cursing later, I have some shredded cheese. Great. Now I'm slicing a tomato and I decide to be innovative and grate a tomato. Forget it, that didn't fucking work. So now I've sliced the tomato into chunks of tomato with the knife. Done. Open up a bag of salad and whatever else and put it in the bowl. Add the cheese. Try to mix it up- mixing is impossible. Great. Fuck it. Add tomatoes and dressing. Try mixing, again. Imfuckingpossible. Get second bowl. Mixing is still impossible because everything keps flopping out the sides of the bowl, again, even though it's half empty.

Well. Everything is a mess now. But. I have a HUGE salad. And I'm going to watch my program. I'm never going into the kitchen, again.

you sound retarded, couldn't even make your own salad from a bag.

Sorry to hear that you're literally a child.

Confessing to not being able to make a salad? Take a cooking class...meet some girl there who also can't cook.

lol, funny thing is all the best cooks in the world are men :D

you have issues

Thats why the bulk of the greatest chefs are men

Almost every guy I know can cook, enjoys it, and has a specialty.

i LOL'd :1orglaugh

Salad is gay anyway.. :1orglaugh:winkwink:

Yep, Mines Steak, I can BBQ a mean Steak with my own maranade, I can thk my mom for the awesome recipe . Ive made a few unreal pork ribs in my day but can never replicate my experimental recipe.

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

And I thought you were going to serve me Spanakopita and involtini tonight. Damn.

Do some work and get your own place rather than being relying on others and you will know where your own cheese grater is.

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

http://lookpic.com/i/48/1iX0moLx.jpeg

what i want...:thumbsup

I can make a few things in the kitchen like omelettes/pancakes for the kids in morning and I can prepare steaks on the grill and barbecue on the pit but I don't consider myself a cook because I cannot create meals like a thanksgiving diner.

If you cannot create a good well tasting well balanced holiday meal for a a family then you really can't cook you may have mastered a part of cooking. That's like taking a naked picture of you having sex and then claiming you are a porn star.

But you MrMaxwell should be able to make a salad.

As long as you didn't cut your fingers with the knife or the cheese grater, consider it a success. Although have to question why you would buy salad in a bag. Buy each individual item and make it all from scratch. It's the only way to go.

MrMaxwell === New JohnnyClips?

How can you not make a salad?

Grating a tomato? Are you retarded? I mean seriously, have you even handled a tomato before? Do you understand the concept of grating?

there are people who think they are the same person. i don't but there are similarties in writing style and dimwittedness that make you wonder.

So what you're saying is, you want someone to toss your salad?

Actually, thanksgiving dinner is pretty easy to make. When dealing with meals that have multiple dishes the hardest part is getting all the timing right, not any sort of technique.

PUH LEASE...women convinced men to cook so they would help out and now men are 'all' the best cooks. too funny!

You should TOSS salad, not MIX it...

http://img1.etsystatic.com/000/0/559....314278073.jpg

a lot alike but in 2005 johnnyclips was still playing with his J.I.Joes in 3rd grade

That's a pretty weird comparison. I know plenty of people that attempt to make a Thanksgiving dinner and it's absolutely terrible, I would not consider them good cooks just because they can make a Thanksgiving dinner. All you need to do to make a Thanksgiving dinner is open up a book and follow directions.

Don't sell yourself short, I'm sure you would be able to cook a nice Thanksgiving dinner no problem based on what you say you can cook.

I enjoy cooking for myself,although some other people might not like it

I can grill a steak so well it'll make your mouth water off of you
That's what I have for dinner most nights.. a 1.5-2.5lb flat iron steak

You should probably work on your "cooking" skills. Women like men who can cook. At least learn to BBQ, comon...what kind of man are you? :(

milk and burger = ok !

The women who like men who can cook and do dishes and vacuum and do laundry are not my kind of women at all

You are one of these -

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_MKCdfZ85Z5...00/spanner.jpg

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh thanks for the laughs!

cooking can be a pretty therapeutic tool I find. So much so that it's become one of my favourite hobbies. I would check out the food network, it is full of shows that specialize in quick and easy meals that sound fancy but only take 5 mins.

example,

next time, take those same ingredients; toast some bread, slice your tomato as thick as you like, a few leafy parts of the lettuce and grab yourself some smoked bacon from a local butcher or market (SO much better than the packaged stuff, and normally cheaper! and you can get them to slice it as thick or thin as you prefer) Pan fry that up quick until its a bit crispy, throw that all on the toast with a bit of salt pepper and some mayo and you got one killer blt.

I don't eat bread much at all these days so I would just cut up a few extra pieces of lettuce and use that as the bun instead, which works perfectly well.