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BFT3K 06-12-2013 05:51 PM

My Annual Chicken Fire
 
http://wac.309d.edgecastcdn.net/8030...ges/640087.jpg

Apparently I need to make this mistake once a year. I'm not sure why, but it is clearly an annual obligation.

I'm at the stupidmarket, and I notice chicken leg quarters are on sale. Now personally, I don't really like chicken legs, and I don't really like chicken thighs, so you would think I would just move on, but no. For reasons which are clearly beyond me, the sale is too good to pass up. I go ahead and purchase a product I don't even want, in the oversized family value pack, even though I live alone.

Then I bring the groceries home, and I wonder, once again, why I bought these crumby chicken parts. I think about all different ways to cook them, but in the end, it's always the same - I need to put them on the BBQ grill. Again, I don't know why.

Within no time, the grill is a flaming mess of horrible chicken fat. The fire's insane, the chicken is blackened, and once again, I remember that I don't even like chicken leg quarters to begin with.

Time passes, smoke gets in my eyes, the lid of the grill is totally burnt up, but I keep cooking the miserable mess just the same.

Eventually I decide, based upon nothing in particular, that it's time for the ruined chicken to be taken off the grill, so I place it all on a dish and bring it in.

Later I think , hey, let me try some of that god-awful chicken that I burnt up earlier. As expected, it is terrible. The skin is horrible, the chicken is half raw, the smell is unpleasant, and ultimately I just throw it all into the yard for (ironically) the birds to eat.

A normal person would learn a lesson from this, but I am quite certain that at some point next year I will do it all again, because apparently, that's just how I roll.

bronco67 06-12-2013 08:50 PM

I know what it's like to grab the camera accidentally while reaching for the fire extinguisher.

baddog 06-12-2013 09:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bronco67 (Post 19667699)
I know what it's like to grab the camera accidentally while reaching for the fire extinguisher.

:1orglaugh

Get a BBQ that has a lid :2 cents:

brassmonkey 06-12-2013 09:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BFT3K (Post 19667510)
http://wac.309d.edgecastcdn.net/8030...ges/640087.jpg

Apparently I need to make this mistake once a year. I'm not sure why, but it is clearly an annual obligation.

I'm at the stupidmarket, and I notice chicken leg quarters are on sale. Now personally, I don't really like chicken legs, and I don't really like chicken thighs, so you would think I would just move on, but no. For reasons which are clearly beyond me, the sale is too good to pass up. I go ahead and purchase a product I don't even want, in the oversized family value pack, even though I live alone.

Then I bring the groceries home, and I wonder, once again, why I bought these crumby chicken parts. I think about all different ways to cook them, but in the end, it's always the same - I need to put them on the BBQ grill. Again, I don't know why.

Within no time, the grill is a flaming mess of horrible chicken fat. The fire's insane, the chicken is blackened, and once again, I remember that I don't even like chicken leg quarters to begin with.

Time passes, smoke gets in my eyes, the lid of the grill is totally burnt up, but I keep cooking the miserable mess just the same.

Eventually I decide, based upon nothing in particular, that it's time for the ruined chicken to be taken off the grill, so I place it all on a dish and bring it in.

Later I think , hey, let me try some of that god-awful chicken that I burnt up earlier. As expected, it is terrible. The skin is horrible, the chicken is half raw, the smell is unpleasant, and ultimately I just throw it all into the yard for (ironically) the birds to eat.

A normal person would learn a lesson from this, but I am quite certain that at some point next year I will do it all again, because apparently, that's just how I roll.

you like extra crispy and charred am i right? :helpme

deltav 06-12-2013 09:20 PM

Dude! You need to pile the hot coals on one side only (or turn the heat up one side if gas) - that way you can get a nice brief sear on the chicken via direct heat, then move to a slightly cooler section of the grill so they can cook thru without bursting into flames. Chicken ain't something you just put above the coals & hope for the best. Thighs are the best part of the bird if you know how to cook em.

candyflip 06-12-2013 09:25 PM

Hot coals, organic chicken thighs and some homemade BBQ sauce.

That's the best way to do the "cheaper" chicken cuts.

Spunky 06-12-2013 09:37 PM

I like crispy chicken too

brassmonkey 06-12-2013 09:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by candyflip (Post 19667724)
Hot coals, organic chicken thighs and some homemade BBQ sauce.

That's the best way to do the "cheaper" chicken cuts.

let me guess you like water hose chicken as well

J. Falcon 06-13-2013 06:04 AM

Good job.

DamianJ 06-13-2013 06:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deltav (Post 19667723)
Dude! You need to pile the hot coals on one side only (or turn the heat up one side if gas) - that way you can get a nice brief sear on the chicken via direct heat, then move to a slightly cooler section of the grill so they can cook thru without bursting into flames. Chicken ain't something you just put above the coals & hope for the best. Thighs are the best part of the bird if you know how to cook em.

QFT

In the UK we really BBQ badly. Very badly. Burnt on the outside and raw in the middle.

So last year I decided to learn how the Americanland people do it. So I did lots of research, and found out all about what you posted above and indirect heat. Now I am the BBQ king!

Most evenings in the summer I cook on the grill, everything, and make some bloody good flatbread on it too!

I'm now just trying really hard to justify buying a Big Green Egg...:)

RebelR 06-13-2013 08:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by candyflip (Post 19667724)
Hot coals, organic chicken thighs and some homemade BBQ sauce.

That's the best way to do the "cheaper" chicken cuts.

oddly enough, the thighs aren't much cheaper anymore. Was talking with a meat broker who told me that much of what we used to consider the cheaper cuts (really anything other than the breast) are now exported to Asia and Indonesia, where they prefer the meat with more taste in their cooking, thus driving the price up. But you are right about the thighs and BBQ. Any BBQ competition I've ever seen features Thighs in the chicken category.

PR_Glen 06-13-2013 09:01 AM

http://www.latestbuy.com.au/img/prod.../beer-350a.jpg

i don't have to even check it ever.. 1 hour and 15 minutes on low later its done.. heh

bigluv 06-13-2013 10:54 AM

Thighs is the best

PhoneSexKing 06-13-2013 10:56 AM

+1 for beer can chicken!

JFK 06-13-2013 11:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brassmonkey (Post 19667721)
you like extra crispy and charred am i right? :helpme

Cajun Style blackened:winkwink::1orglaugh

atom 06-26-2013 02:22 PM

So, I was at the grocery store today and they had the huge chicken grill pack. I thought to myself as I stuck it in my cart. I wonder if my shit is gonna catch on fire like BFT3K's did.

atom 06-26-2013 08:37 PM

My chicken turned out fantastic! Thanks for all the concern....

myjah 06-26-2013 10:33 PM

You're an excellent writer. Good luck next year on your Annual Chicken Ruination.

BAKO 06-26-2013 10:42 PM

Best story ever lol


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