Self quarantine jokes?
 

Lol read this:

From the Self Quarantine Diary:
Day 1 – I Can Do This!! Got enough food and wine to last a month!

Day 2 – Opening my 8th bottle of Wine. I fear wine supplies might not last

Day 3 – Strawberries: Some have 210 seeds, some have 235 seeds. Who Knew??

Day 4 – 8:00pm. Removed my Day Pajamas and put on my Night Pajamas.

Day 5 – Today, I tried to make Hand Sanitizer. It came out as Jello Shots!!

Day 6 – I get to take the Garbage out. I’m So excited, I can’t decide what to wear.

Day 7 – Laughing way too much at my own jokes!!

Day 8 – Went to a new restaurant called “The Kitchen”. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have No clue how this place is still in business.

Day 9 – I put liquor bottles in every room. Tonight, I’m getting all dressed up and going Bar hopping.

Day 10 – Struck up a conversation with a Spider today. Seems nice. He’s a Web Designer.

Day 11 – Isolation is hard. I swear my fridge just said, “What the hell do you want now?”

Day 12 – I realized why dogs get so excited about something moving outside, going for walks or car rides. I think I just barked at a squirrel.

Day 13 – If you keep a glass of rum in each hand, you can’t accidently touch your face.

Day 14 – Watched the birds fight over a worm. The Cardinals led the Blue Jays 3–1.

Day 15 – Anybody else feel like they’ve cooked dinner about 395 times this month?

Good ones! It's not too bad when you're used to working from home Sir.

Some that aren't are going crazy!!

I decided I needed a couple days at home, I think I've been on the road for over a month.

We're kinda isolated already, but with this going on it's crazy, you show up to a Walmart distribution center and before you can make a delivery, they take your temperature.

Another place we had to wash our hands before we were allowed to talk to anyone.

All the truck stops are running, but no refill cups on coffee and no open food. They even put donuts in bags so no one handles food directly.

Thank God for take out. I got food delivered to my truck the other night. I felt like dressing up.

:thumbsup:thumbsup:thumbsup

Black Comedy :1orglaugh

I just got through building a sand castle with my neighbors. The crematorium kicked me out.

Virus shouldn't last long, It was made in China.

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

Knock knock
Who's there?
Go the fuck away you fucking idiot maybe you gots the Covid!!