such a loss yesterday
 

on Saturday I got the news my fav person in my neighbourhood had died. I'm not saying that cuz he's dead. dude was a massively important friend to me. absolutely my fav person. I could talk to him about anything and he was so much fun


I knew something was wrong, N's shop was closed for a week and I wasn't sure if he was taking a (well deserved) vacation or dealing with his newly opened biz in a nearby town or what. was on the verge of calling him but decided to wait a week and on the 8th day his place was open

I can see his place 'cross the road from my kitchen window and was checking every morning

anyway, scurried over, he said he was feeling sick. he looked ok. just a lil thin but he was always thin. a 68 year old vegan Rasta dude who didn't touch alcohol or processed food

then, after two days, closed again. for over a month. I was calling his phone every other day, went straight to messages. asked everyone in the area if they had any info but most peeps didn't even know his first name, let alone his last. everyone here uses nicknames, I only knew his real first name cuz he told me

all I wanted was a fucking last name so I could call hospitals, I knew something was wrong

a good friend of mine K managed to find his home location through his sister, and today (Sunday), we were gonna go on a search of his hood if he didn't answer the door, to at least find out his last name

K came by Sat evening to break the news, didn't want to do it over whatsapp. colon cancer. died that afternoon


I cried like a biatch on the stoop. didn't even cry when my dad died. I guess cuz that was shock and this was something I kinda knew (something was wrong). fuck, I dunno


this was a dude I'd visit almost every day, to buy a lil weed or mostly just to say hey and explore life and thoughts on everything. I really loved him and I don't use that term lightly

would deliberately go in the early evening when fewer people so we could talk more freely about everything. life, work, books, cats, history, biz structure when he was creating his new operation (I gave him a lot of advice on how to set a US corp as a non-US resident as I've done it before and he wanted to make sure that if anything happened to him -maybe I should have read more into that- that his kids and grandkids would be financially compensated through a corp structure with two partners via shares)


also made so many wonderful female friends through his place, as men were strictly forbidden from hitting on women there so it was a place we liked to gather


anyway, went over to my friend K's (one who broke the news to me) place tonight, where I did not expect to see a bunch of peeps I knew from N's


turned into a total celebration of his life. all his fav music. everyone dancing on the street, all of us laughing and talking and remembering our best memories and burning up the road. a few tears but that is what hugs are for. just how N would have wanted it


I miss my friend. hug your loved ones close and thank you for listening

Thanks for sharing story about your neighbor, sounds like a good person and awesome friend to you. So sorry for your loss. :( :(

thank you J

you woulda loved him

I only knew him for ten months and in that span two stray cats adopted him. they would have it no other way

N was all "I'm not even a cat person" (he only took over the place a month before I moved there but quickly became a neighbourhood fixture) and I was like well, apparently they feel differently :1orglaugh

he loved them up so. youngest of the two kept drooling on his hand during scritching sessions. 'not a cat person' my azz


few weeks ago they decided to stay at K's place next door so I think that would make him happy


but yeah, tonight was such a wonderful tribute to an important man. I didn't expect it, just thought I was going out for a walk with a friend. in a sad time reminded me why I love this place


RIP N


thank you for your kindness J. big ups

It seems like every week someone I know has died. It's getting old.

Sorry about your loss.

Condolences Jessie :(

thank you MMG and @Rochard, tell me about it. never gets easier though does it

I feel so much better after last night. was such a wonderful neighbourhood tribute to him. helped to write about him too

thanks again y'all for listening, I'll stop using gfy like my personal diary now :upsidedow


much love to all

R.i.P. N

I am so sorry to hear this. Warm thoughts to you and all those affected by the loss

thanks Tasty and Legacy. lucky to have such good memories. I'm grateful for that

happy thoughts. life is beautiful even when hard. love to ya both

I would have never posted such personal info on this forum. 2c

Sorry to hear about the loss of your friend, Jesse. The way you describe him and the celebration you had, he sounds like he was a great guy. RIP N.

he was so important to me 2MM. thank you


for real y'all, thread done


thank you so fucking much for your standing with me in a tough moment. all of you

hard fucking loss. gratitude to all y'all immensely for just helping me work through it

just love your peeps and hug everyone within reach every day

crazy how fast life goes. you always want to give a departed one a last hug and an 'I love you' but it doesn't happen that way so do it now

again, much love. this is a special place


now a fun track to alienate everyone but Rebel





N loved this track


love to you all

xoxoxoxo!

Jesse jesse jesse!!!

He sounds like such a delightful person, and so humble on the "I'm not a cat guy" hehe, I knew he'd be a deep down lover since you're friends with him :thumbsup
You're so welcome, you give kindness, and you should expect & deserve that back. Love karma.
Hope you feel better soon Jesse and RIP N :Oh crap

Something for your blues . . .

I can't post some response hip hop in an N thread so this will have to suffice





actually based on lyrics prob not appropriate either but he was a big boy. sure he coulda handled it :upsidedow


gracias el C. big hugs. you too J, as always


hope everyone is having a fun, happy, lucrative night

You talk nonsense and are white.....RIP to your homie

well everyone but you seems to understand me fine. and he wasn't my 'homie', he was my friend whom I cared about deeply. only one using that parlance is you

I'm not Black. because I listen to dancehall, hip hop and reggaeton I'm trying to be? sorry, didn't realize music was supposed to be segregated

I guess that delightful post of yours in el C's thread 90k was in relation to me? lol, learn some Spanish, 'Me Niegas' means 'You Deny Me', which was a play on el C and Sarettah's whole emergency hug thing. directed toward a dude who uh, speaks Spanish

why you fucking up this thread with your negativity?


thanks again to everyone who offered real condolences. much love to you all

Jesse, ignore the fools and haters. Some people only exist to try to bring others down.

You are in our hearts and J and I are thinking about you.

Stay strong.

Rreally? Wow its a world of love and of hate....find yours

Well we are on this, your post come across as a black female? I can see you are white in your pic, whats with that? Doi you want to be black or is it what you transpire too? im not "shading" just trying to keep it REAl?

You are trash, plain and simple.

Jessie, so sorry for your loss.